You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic: It is better to buy just a few expensive clothes, rather than lots of cheaper clothes. Do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.
Some people argue that it is better to purchase a few expensive
clothes
rather than a lot of affordable one
. I believe purchasing more expensive Correct pronoun usage
ones
items
in a moderate number
is more preferred than buying cheaper stuff in an excessive number
. The reasons are quality over quantity and more
sustainable approach.
Expensive Correct article usage
a more
items
closely related to their amazing qualities. They tend to have better qualities in terms of what kind of fabrics Add a verb
items are
items were
do
they use for the Unnecessary verb
apply
clothes
and how neat their stiches
are. Correct your spelling
stitches
Therefore
, they give higher
Add an article
a higher
Fix the agreement mistake
prices
price
Fix the agreement mistake
prices
Change preposition
for
to
their final Change preposition
for
items
. Frequently, better quality of
Change preposition
apply
fashion
items
last
for couple
Correct article usage
a couple
years
compared to the cheaper Change preposition
of years
option
. Fix the agreement mistake
options
Thus
, investing in an extravagant fashion
item will save a lot of money in the long run.
Furthermore
, purchasing less item
is one of Fix the agreement mistake
fewer items
sustainable
Correct article usage
the sustainable
approach
to help the world combat Fix the agreement mistake
approaches
the
climate change and reduce fabric waste. As we all know, today’s Correct article usage
apply
fashion
trend is all about fast-
fashion
trend
. Fix the agreement mistake
trends
Fast-
fashion
industries offer relatively cheaper fashion
good
options towards Correct word choice
apply
its
customers. With the Correct pronoun usage
their
increasing
in Replace the word
increase
fast-
fashion
production, it is proven to enlarge the quantity of fabric waste from the textile industries. Aside of
that, Change preposition
from
fast-
fashion
production requires a lot of labors
to create tons of Fix the agreement mistake
labor
clothes
, whom
mainly being underpaid by the company.
Correct word choice
and
Overall
, I do agree with the idea to buy
expensive Change preposition
of buying
clothes
in a small number
rather than buy
more affordable Wrong verb form
buying
clothes
in an excessive number
. This
is due to
the expensive cloth has better quality and more
sustainable approach to help the world combat the Correct article usage
a more
sustainable
problems.Replace the word
sustainability
Submitted by rkarinameu on
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task achievement
Your essay offers a clear stance on the topic and gives relevant reasons to support your argument. However, your task response could be improved by providing more specific examples to illustrate your points. For instance, mentioning specific brands or experiences could add depth to your argument.
coherence cohesion
Your essay is generally well-organized, and the main points are logically structured. However, there are some areas where transitions between ideas could be smoother. Consider using cohesive devices, such as 'Furthermore' and 'Moreover,' more judiciously to make your writing flow better.
coherence cohesion
You have a strong introduction and conclusion, which frame your essay nicely. However, the coherence within paragraphs might benefit from more variety in sentence structure and tighter connections between sentences. For example, the first sentence of the second paragraph could lead directly into the specifics of fabric quality and stitching.
task achievement
Your argument is clear and consistent throughout the essay, which makes your stance very understandable.
task achievement
You provide solid reasons for your views, which strengthens your position and makes it more convincing.
coherence cohesion
Your essay is capped with a strong conclusion that effectively summarizes your argument.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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