IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

In some cities and towns all over the world, the high volume of traffic is a problem. What are the causes of this and what actions can be taken to solve this problem

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The growth of the human population in some urban areas significantly enlarged inevitable
traffic
Use synonyms
 congestion challenges.
While
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 the advent of new technologies triggered a desire to buy new state-of-the-art vehicles
such
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 as hybrid and electric cars, the authorities
also
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 expected to adjust
traffic
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 management policies to ease a remarkable volume of road load. On the one hand, private car ownership in a number of cities has grown dramatically over the years, causing more
traffic
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 jams in metropolitan.
Furthermore
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, the increasing popularity of private accommodations that are mostly located in outer suburbs results in the growth of transit flow.
For instance
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, individuals in the Australian
city
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 of Melbourne tend to work in
city
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 centres and live in calm, private areas in remote locations, which are mostly abandoned by public transportation.
As a result
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, individuals are encouraged to
use
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 their own vehicles or taxis with the
use
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 of apps like Uber, Grab, and Bee thanks to the development of technology.
On the other hand
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, the officials can play a crucial role in resolving the drawbacks of roadblocks. New lanes can be constructed to relieve
traffic
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 bottlenecks caused by rush hours, accompanied by appropriate temporary roads to handle obstacles.
In addition
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, expanding the area coverage of public transportation can steadily extend the number of commuters in
this
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 sector and reduce the popularity of less affordable
use
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 of private transport.
For example
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, the Russian
city
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 of Kazan combatted the excessive
use
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 of private cars by launching additional lanes in the subway in 2 remote areas.
Additionally
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, the taxes risen noticeably for accessing the
city
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 centre by private cars,
this
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 initiative supported tackling the mentioned blockage and reduced greenhouse emissions as well. In conclusion, to recapitulate, the overuse of private transport, the lack of remote public transit, and poor road tax regulations have always been the obvious justifications for the rapidity of
traffic
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.
However
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,
this
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 can be dealt
with
Change preposition
with with
show examples
 the encouragement of using public transportation and the interference of government in improving gridlock.

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task response
In the introduction, clarify the connection between the rise in vehicle ownership and traffic congestion. Additionally, try to keep sentences clear and focused to maintain the reader's understanding and avoid overly complex sentence structures.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence that easily identifies the main idea. This helps to enhance logical flow and maintain coherence throughout the essay.
coherence cohesion
Make sure to clearly link the examples to the points they are meant to illustrate. This improves overall cohesion and makes arguments more persuasive.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps to frame the argument and provides a clear structure.
task response
Made effective use of relevant examples, which helped to illustrate the points being made.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • traffic congestion
  • urbanization
  • car ownership
  • public transportation
  • carpooling
  • cycling infrastructure
  • congestion pricing
  • population growth
  • commute
  • sustainable transport
  • traffic management
  • ride-sharing
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