IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8

Some people say that we no longer need printed newspaper. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #newspaper
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In
this
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 modern era, most
people
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 would prefer to browse
news
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 online rather than read
newspapers
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, so it is claimed by some
people
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 that printed
newspapers
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 are obsolete and unnecessary. I do not support it, putting forward that printed media are still of vital importance. It is indisputable that nowadays,
people
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 are more accessible to information
due to
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 the proliferation of the Internet. They can look through the
news
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 online at any trivial time they want with only a click on their smartphones, which can satisfy the public with its convenience and flexibility. What is more,
this
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 kind of
news
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 is up-to-date
as well as
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 contains unlimited resources of
news
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, making sure
people
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 can recognize current affairs over the globe and discover the latest messages of the things they are concerned about,
such
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 as which club won the match
last
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 night.
By contrast
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, it takes loads of time for
news
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 outlets to collect information, report the events and
then
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 issue them to the public.
However
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, on no account can the public ignore the significance of printed
newspapers
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, especially to senior citizens.
To begin
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 with, most of them are conservative and consider reading
newspapers
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 as a daily routine and even a companion. They may fail to accept using the Internet as an alternative to printed
newspapers
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 to look through
news
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. Once newspaper disappears, they will definitely feel abandoned by society and frustrated.
Moreover
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, information in
newspapers
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 is more reliable as it is published under strict supervision
while
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 there may be exaggerated things on the Internet. For
people
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 who do not have the ability to judge the reliability of reports, like the elderly and the young,
newspapers
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 should be the most suitable way to connect with the world. In a nutshell, though print media are not convenient
as well as
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 content-rich compared with electronic media, we cannot ignore their merits. From my perspective, it still has its own demand and will not disappear in the future.
Submitted by christianwang on

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task achievement
Your essay presents a clear position and provides relevant arguments and examples to support your stance. However, to improve the clarity and sophistication of your arguments, consider exploring counterarguments and addressing them.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea and that the ideas flow logically from one to the next. Use more transitional phrases to enhance coherence and guide the reader through your arguments.
task achievement
Your introduction effectively sets up the topic and clearly states your position, which helps to engage the reader from the beginning.
task achievement
You provide relevant examples and explanations to support your main points, which strengthens your argument.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear structure, with distinct paragraphs for introduction, main points, and conclusion. This organization makes it easier for the reader to follow your train of thought.
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