The 21st century has begun. What changes do you think this new century will bring?

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As we already stepped into the 21st century, it comes with several advanced and innovative changes, related to almost every field in order to meet the demands of people's lives.
Although
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there are some benefits,
this
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innovation
also
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brings negative effects. On the one hand, technological advances might lead to advantages that humans will experience in that new era. Regarding the former, the rapid development of technology, particularly in communication and automation, has drastically changed how we live, work, and learn. To cite an instance, mobile phones with video calls give access to contact with others easily, eliminating barriers of geographical distance and making people close together.
Moreover
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, the invention of Artificial intelligence in the home started with the introduction of labour-saving appliances
such
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as washing machines and dishwashers.
Therefore
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, many citizens can save time and reduce the amount of work or effort to do household chores.
On the other hand
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, despite its positive effects, there are many disadvantages of
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issue. The effects of global warming are becoming increasingly evident, and we are likely to see more extreme weather events. More and more residents are moving to cities which increases transportation requirements, leading to a higher carbon footprint and emissions into the atmosphere.
Consequently
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, climate change affects rising sea levels and resource scarcity because of melting ice and the exploitation of humans. In conclusion, in spite of the fact that the 21st century brings advantages namely technological breakthroughs, it
also
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has drawbacks like unpleasant weather and rising sea levels.

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task achievement
To improve, provide more specific examples and detailed explanations to fully support your points. This will help strengthen your arguments and make your essay more persuasive.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that all paragraphs are well-developed and contain clear and coherent ideas. This includes having a strong topic sentence and sufficient supporting sentences in each paragraph.
coherence cohesion
The essay presents a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
task achievement
Some relevant examples are provided to support the points made, such as the advancements in communication and automation technologies.
task achievement
The writer discusses both positive and negative aspects of the 21st century, showing a balanced view on the topic.

Your opinion

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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