The pia and bar charts show information about the people who are attending different kinds of dances and locations, in Australia

IELTS Writing Task Chart for The pia and bar charts show information about the people who are attending different kinds of dances and locations, in Australia

Overall

Linking Words

, more dancers attend private studios

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

and youngsters who are under 11 show great

participants

Replace the word

participation

show examples

According to

Linking Words

the pie chart, Privity studios take about half (48%) of training centers,

While

Linking Words

, in there College-based studios just 10% of the whole. Community halls and School halls(after school) have near

percentage

Fix the agreement mistake

percentages

show examples

Change preposition

of 18

show examples

% and 24%, respectively, in

Remove the article

apply

show examples

one town. The bar chart shows 3 types of

dance

Use synonyms

classes

Use synonyms

Ballet

Use synonyms

, Tap, and Modern.

Also

Linking Words

, there are

classes

Use synonyms

(by their age) under 11 and between 11-16.

Ballet

Use synonyms

is the most

are attending

Wrong verb form

attended

show examples

dance

Use synonyms

class among young participants with just more than 600 visitors, currently. Meanwhile, young participants' numbers are showing a downtrend

Change preposition

show examples

Tap and Modern

dance

Use synonyms

classes

Use synonyms

, respectively around 450 and 300.

Also

Linking Words

. opposite trend by age

classes

Use synonyms

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

Modern, Tap, and

Ballet

Use synonyms

, respectively Over 500 and around 400 and just under 300.

Overall

Linking Words

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

most students

are attending

Wrong verb form

attend

show examples

Ballet

Use synonyms

dance

Use synonyms

classes

Use synonyms

while

Linking Words

other

Correct article usage

the other

show examples

class

Fix the agreement mistake

classes

show examples

almost

Add a missing verb

have almost

show examples

the same number

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Jun 27, 2024

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also, overall, while".

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.

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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words dance, classes, ballet with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "show" in your introduction.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "show" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.

▼

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4
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

157 words

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The pia and bar charts show information about the people who are attending different kinds of dances and locations, in Australia

One of the consquences of improved medical care is that people are living longer and life expectancy is increasing. Do you think the advantacges of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Some countries have introduced laws to limit working hours for employees. Why are these laws introduced? Do you think they are a positive or negative development?

- Today more people are travelling than ever before. - Why is this case? - What are the benefits of travelling for the traveller? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Nowadays young people lack an understanding of how to manage their finances after they finish high school. Explain why they do not know how to manage money and how this can be changed. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.