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Writing Samples
Band 5

In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or buildings they live in. what are the reasons for this ? how can people research this ?

#countries #people #history #house #buildings #research
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In many countries, there is an upward trend where people tend to pay attention to the history of their properties. Personally, it seems to me that human begins to keen on and realize the importance of history as a part of their identity is a primary reason, and looking for many sources
such
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 as artefacts or scripts is one of the best ways to fulfil their desire.
To begin
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 with,
a
Correct article usage
the
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 historical background of a particular property is related to the back story of its owner and how it
inheritance
Wrong verb form
is inherited
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 through generations.
Furthermore
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, the historical value of buildings can not separated from
culture
Correct article usage
the culture
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 and traditions of those,
whom
Change preposition
to whom
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 they belong. The traditional house of Tongkonan is an example, which is not only a place to live for a family but
also
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contain
Change the verb form
contains
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 so
much
Correct quantifier usage
many
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 cultural and traditional values .
In addition
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,
whether
Correct word choice
apply
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the shape, the curvings of its wall, or even its accessories can describe the social status and family traditions of its residents.
On the other hand
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, searching for various sources could be an effective approach to finding out all of the historical value of a certain house.
Although
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,
Remove the comma
apply
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 there are a few articles provided online, people still have another option,
such
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 as direct interviews with their elders.
Moreover
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, learning from heritages as ancients and traditional tools is another approach to finding out what they want to know.
To conclude
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, it seems to me that the phenomenon of individuals being keen on the historical story of any certain property is related to their identity, whether they want to know how it
inheritance
Wrong verb form
is inherited
show examples
 through generations or even their family story and its social level.
Additionally
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, there are many methods to
filfull
Correct your spelling
fill
 their
curiously
Replace the word
curiosity
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,
such
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 as interviewing their elder
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 or learning from their heritage.
Submitted by k a l l a on

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task achievement
Your task response is generally complete and addresses the prompt. However, try to develop your ideas more fully. Provide more detailed explanations and explore additional reasons why people might be interested in the history of their homes.
coherence cohesion
To improve coherence and cohesion, ensure that transitions between ideas are clear, and maintain a consistent flow of information. Some of your sentences can be rephrased for clarity and better connection between ideas.
coherence cohesion
You have structured your essay well with a clear introduction and conclusion.
task achievement
Your essay includes relevant examples, such as the traditional house of Tongkonan, which support your points effectively.
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