Some people believe that no one should be allowed to continue working after the age of 65. However, other says that there shouldn't be limitation on age and anyone should be allowed to work regardless of their age. Discuss both views, give your own opinion and include relevant examples.

#people #age #shouldn #limitation #anyone #work

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The

age

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of retirement from employment has become a topic of massive debate among the general public. There is

one

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faction of people that believes that

one

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should not be allowed to indulge in employment after he/she reaches the

age

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of 65. The other group,

however

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, is of the view that

this

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threshold on

age

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should not be applied and

one

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must be free to work regardless of

one

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age

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. In

this

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essay, we are going to discuss both arguments and provide a reliable solution of our own. Looking at the former viewpoint, it is going to benefit both the retirees and the companies. If

such

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a limitation is applied,

this

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would greatly reduce the exploitation of old workers at the hands of their employers. In the absence of

such

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a limit, corporations would continue to use them for their work even when they are not able to do it anymore, which would only delay the availability of pensions and other government benefits they are entitled to.

Moreover

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,a person retiring at a certain

age

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only paves the way for young employees to take over, bringing with them, fresh views and ways to get things done.

Lastly

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this

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would enhance the productivity of the company as older employees are comparatively less efficient than their younger counterparts.

On the other hand

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, the argument of no limitation holds some weight as well. There are many old people who live a very lonely and tedious life. Being employed gives them a reason to look forward to the next day

while

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also

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earning enough to live a satisfactory and independent life. Their experience of several years

also

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makes them a valuable asset for the companies so the corporations would like them to continue for a few more years.

To conclude

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, it can be said that both viewpoints have their own advantages.

Nonetheless

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, in my opinion, the government should apply a legal limit on the retirement

age

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as it is more beneficial for society as a whole.

Submitted by komalverma271999 on Wed Jul 03 2024

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task achievement

Your essay demonstrates a good understanding of the prompt and covers both perspectives effectively. However, including more specific examples could strengthen your argument.

coherence cohesion

Your essay generally flows well and has a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. To make it even better, ensure there is a smoother transition between some of the points in your paragraphs.

task achievement

Although your ideas are clear and comprehensive, they can be enhanced by adding more detail and depth to your arguments.

coherence cohesion

Minor grammatical errors and a few awkward phrasing issues can be easily fixed to improve the overall clarity and readability of your essay.

coherence cohesion

Your essay is well-structured, with clear separation of ideas across paragraphs, making it easy to follow.

task achievement

You have successfully discussed both viewpoints and provided a balanced discussion before giving your opinion, demonstrating a good understanding of the topic.

coherence cohesion

Your conclusion is well-articulated and effectively summarizes your main points and opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

331 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

mandatory retirement
workforce regeneration
transition planning
cognitive decline
predictable transition
physical endurance
job performance
financial necessity
personal fulfillment
flexible retirement policy
economic reasons
expertise
consultancy roles
active participation

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Some people believe that no one should be allowed to continue working after the age of 65. However, other says that there shouldn't be limitation on age and anyone should be allowed to work regardless of their age. Discuss both views, give your own opinion and include relevant examples.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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Some people say that in all levels of education, from primary schools to universities, too much time is spent on learning facts and not enough on learning practical skills. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that men and woman have different qualities, therefore certain jobs are suitable for men and others for women.To what extent do you agree or disagree ?

Many families move to different countries. Some people think children can benefit from this, while others consider it is hard for children if families move to a foreign country. Discuss both views and your opinion.