Some people believe that after the child begins his/her schooling their teachers will have more influence than their parents. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Nowadays there are people who believe that a school
teacher
have been more powerful in the student
life Change noun form
student's
then
his parents. In the beginning, I want to highlight, that Replace the word
than
this
question has not definitely answer. Moreover
, I think that it's a
greatest Change the article
the
sing
of growing up - Correct your spelling
sign
ability
to look at a question from several points of view. So I'll want to discuss Add an article
the ability
at
Change preposition
in
this
essay my agreement and disagreement with this
statement.
First of all, why I'm
agree with Unnecessary verb
I
this
statement. It's clearly
, that the root of good tuition is Change the word
clear
the
trust. If we don'Correct article usage
apply
t
believe to
our tutor in some sphere of life (not only in the academic sphere), we can'Change preposition
in
t
percieve
him. It may Correct your spelling
perceive
cause
by some mistake that he didn'Wrong verb form
be caused
t
want to admit, or some lies that we caught him. For instanse
, two years ago, Correct your spelling
instance
while
studying for a master
degree in Israel, we Change noun form
master's
had
studied in Hebrew, but our paramount book was in English. Our lecturer Unnecessary verb
apply
had
made some Unnecessary verb
apply
mistakes
when she translated the book, and she wasn't
able to accept her error. So it's unpossible
to study with a Correct your spelling
impossible
teacher
that can't
acknowledge his faults. So, the influence of a great teacher
is stronger then
of the parents.
Replace the word
than
On the other hand
, the teacher
status is
not transform the men Verb problem
does
to
God. Change preposition
into
Furthermore
, all of us are the
Correct article usage
apply
human
will Fix the agreement mistake
humans
the
our strong and weak sides, with our own problems. In the past, it was the faith that everything said by the Remove the article
apply
teacher
is sacred, and a student haven'
Correct subject-verb agreement
hasn't
t
rights
to think Fix the agreement mistake
right
on
Change preposition
in
the
another way. Nowadays it changed, but I still think, that the most important thought that parents have to explain to their children is that humans tend to make Remove the article
apply
mistakes
. And that it's very important to know to
Rephrase
how to
access
your faults.
Verb problem
assess
Finally
, it's crutially important
to explain to children before school, that only the man Correct word choice
crucial
which
is doing nothing - Correct pronoun usage
who
don'
Correct subject-verb agreement
doesn't
t
makes
Correct subject-verb agreement
make
mistakes
. And the essential rule of life has to be - be
able to admit your Fix the infinitive
to be
mistakes
.Submitted by anastasia on
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task achievement
Ensure that your essay addresses all parts of the task effectively. In this case, more balance between the influence of teachers and parents should be explored.
task achievement
Try to maintain clear and comprehensive ideas throughout the essay. Some parts could benefit from clearer articulation and supporting arguments.
task achievement
Use relevant and specific examples to strengthen your points. The example regarding your personal experience was helpful but could be more seamlessly integrated and elaborated.
coherence and cohesion
Improve logical structure by clearly organizing your main points and ensuring each paragraph flows smoothly. Some transitions between ideas could be strengthened.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure both the introduction and conclusion are clearly present and effectively summarize your argument. There is a conclusion, but it could more effectively encapsulate your viewpoint.
coherence and cohesion
Support your main points more robustly. Make sure each idea is fully elaborated and backed by relevant evidence or reasoning.
language and grammar
Pay attention to grammatical errors, such as verb agreement and article usage, to enhance readability. For example, "a teacher have" should be "a teacher has," and "it's unpossible" should be "it's impossible."
language and grammar
Work on vocabulary accuracy and variety. Using the correct terms and avoiding repetition will make the text more engaging and precise.
task achievement
Your essay includes a clear argument for both sides of the issue, showing an ability to consider multiple perspectives.
coherence and cohesion
The introduction sets the stage by acknowledging the complexity of the issue. It’s good to see you’re open to discussing different viewpoints.
task achievement
Providing a personal example added a unique perspective to your argument, making it more relatable.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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