in some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. why might this be the case? do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

#countries #home #people #be #case #situation

It is argued by many

people

that having a

house

is an important part of their life, especially for the

people

of Indonesia since it will be the higher achievement of their entire life.

However

, others argue that renting a

house

is preferable since the price of residents is unaffordable. In some

ethnicity

Fix the agreement mistake

ethnicities

show examples

, having a traditional

house

in Indonesia serves not only as a place to stay but

also

as a symbol of status in society.

For instance

, leader of Javanese ethnicity often builds their

house

using a special wood called "jati" which takes many years to grow.

Therefore

this

wood is only afforded by certain

people

such

ethnicity

Replace the word

ethnic

show examples

leaders. Given the cost of buying a property could reach a lifetime mortgage, renting a

house

could be a viable option for some

people

who at least need a place to stay.

This

could be true, especially for some

people

who live in

a big cities

Correct the article-noun agreement

a big city

big cities

show examples

where the availability of land that limited. In conclusion,

although

owning a

house

is everybody's dream,

however

, for some

people

might not have the financial ability to afford it.

Thus

, the rental option could solve

this

problem. So everybody can have a place to live.

Submitted by nourmarasyidah on Sun Jul 14 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

content

Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea and relevant support. For example, separate the arguments for owning a house and renting into distinct paragraphs, each elaborating on the reasons with more relevant examples.

language

Try to improve the range of vocabulary and sentence structures to enhance the overall readability and fluency of the essay.

content

The introduction clearly states the topic and presents the contrasting views on owning versus renting a home.

content

The essay discusses cultural and financial reasons behind the preference for owning a home, which adds depth to the task response.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

201 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

Topic Vocabulary:

ownership
renting
importance
sense of security
stability
financial investment
asset
customize
decorate
belonging
community
potential
future generations
long-term
cost advantage
control
living space

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

8
band
You recently organized an all-day meeting for your company, which took place in a local hotel. In their feedback, participants at the meeting said that they liked the hotel, but they were unhappy about the food that was served for lunch. Write a letter to the manager of the hotel. In the letter • Say what the participants liked about the hotel • Explain why they were unhappy about the food • Suggest what the manger should do to improve the food in future
I am writing in connection with the all-day educational meeting that was held on 21 September in your hotel. I am Mahshid Kargar and I was the manager of that event. According to feedback I acquired via questionnaire, participants who attended the meeting said “Although they had a positive opinion about the hotel, the food that was served for lunch was not suitable.” They had complaints about the variety, taste and quality of the foods.
7.5
band
Nowadays, a lot of people are able to do their work from home. Discuss both the advantage and disadvantages of this develpment.
Working from home is now considered possible for numerous commoners. This trend provides advantages for some of the workers, in the meantime, disadvantages for some too, depending on their personal situation.
5
band
Many small, local shops are closing as they are unable to compete with large supermarkets in the area. How does this effect local communities? How could this situation be improved?
The widespread problem of closure of local businesses that small companies cannot compete with large, international businesses. This essay will discuss the main effects local communities caused by closure of local shops and some possible solutions to avoid them.
6.5
band
Although many people value their public parks, this space could be used other purpose such as residential areas for over growing population or to develop business and boost economics. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this?
It is thought by a selection of individuals that valuable green spaces in many community areas should be demolished and replaced by accommodation and facilities for business to improve the economy due to an influx of people in some cities. From my perspective, I strongly disagree with this notion and my supportive reasons will be outlined in the following paragraphs before reaching a conclusion.
6.5
band
Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development? Write at least 250 words.
In this era, a range of options of therapy are available to be chosen by patients. As a result, a shift happens as more and more people prefer to opt for alternative medicine instead of using conventional medicine by visiting doctors. From my point of view, it is quite difficult to consider this as a positive development.

in some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. why might this be the case? do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

Fully explain your ideas

Nowadays, a lot of people are able to do their work from home. Discuss both the advantage and disadvantages of this develpment.

Many small, local shops are closing as they are unable to compete with large supermarkets in the area. How does this effect local communities? How could this situation be improved?

Although many people value their public parks, this space could be used other purpose such as residential areas for over growing population or to develop business and boost economics. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this?

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development? Write at least 250 words.