IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

You recently did a short cookery course. The cookery school has asked for your feedback on this course. Write a letter to the course director at the cookery school. In your letter - describe what you enjoyed about the course -say how much cooking you've done since the course - suggest another cookery course you'd like the school to offer

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Dear Sir/Madam I hope everything is going well. I am writing
this
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 letter to you regarding feedback on the cookery course, which I have been completed
last
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 year. First of all, I would like to say, that cookery subject is beneficial for beginners, who never tried cooking.
Secondly
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, I enjoyed a lot in
this
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 course because the curriculum was really helpful and easy to understand,
Moreover
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, it helped to enhance the practical skills of students.
Furthermore
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, I learned so many things
while
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 doing
this
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 course,
for instance
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, making various sauces in
diffrent
Correct your spelling
different
 flavours,I used to make the same recipes at my home.Not only
this
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, I got a chance
of
Change preposition
to
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develope
Correct your spelling
develop
developing
 my cooking skills on social media, and it really helped me to increase my fan following, at
this
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 time , I have around 2K followers. Moving
further
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, I want to suggest you
to
Remove the particle
apply
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add more cooking courses to your list,
for example
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, baking and meal decoration. As you know, nowadays people more focus on the presentation of food rather than taste,I hope you will like my idea.
Your
Correct the word
Yours
show examples
 Sincerely Sandeep

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coherence cohesion
To improve logical structure, consider organizing your paragraphs more clearly. For instance, separate the benefits of the course and your personal achievements into distinct sections.
task achievement
To achieve a more complete response, provide more specific details about what you learned in the course and how it has impacted you.
task achievement
Maintain a consistent tone by avoiding overly casual phrases like 'I hope you will like my idea' and substituting them with more formal expressions, such as 'I hope you will consider my suggestion.'
coherence cohesion
Your greeting and closing are appropriately formal, which suits the task's requirements.
task achievement
You have adequately addressed all parts of the task: enjoyment of the course, cooking since the course, and suggesting a new course.
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