Despite a large number of gyms, a sedentary lifestyle is gaining popularity in the contemporary world. What problems are associated with this¬? What solutions can you suggest? s
Even if there
is
a lot of workout Correct subject-verb agreement
are
centers
, Change the spelling
centres
passive
Correct article usage
a passive
lifestyle
is becoming widespread worldwide. This
essay will discuss the problems
associated with sedentary
Add an article
a sedentary
lifestyle
and suggest possible solutions to address them. Inactive
way of living causes an increase in Correct article usage
An inactive
health
problems
such
as obesity, diabetes, cardiovascular
diseases among the population. Correct word choice
and cardiovascular
The
possible solution could be inserting mandatory physical activities in people’s lives by equipping their workplaces with special tools for their physical training.
The most significant issue arising from a sedentary Correct article usage
A
lifestyle
is the adverse impact on health
. People who lead a non-active lifestyle
often suffer from chronic diseases. For instance
, research made by professors from the Baylor College of Medicine shows that 65% of people with inactive lifestyle
have way more Fix the agreement mistake
lifestyles
health
risks compared to those who do sports on a daily basis.
Creating more opportunities for physical activity in daily life is crucial. Facilities such
as gyms, standing desks, and organizing regular fitness sessions should be provided for employees. Furthermore
, integrating physical education into school curriculums can instil healthy habits from a young age. Extracurricular sports programs can also
play a significant role in promoting a healthy lifestyle
among the
students. Correct article usage
apply
For example
, BBC news
has reported that people who go to schools and workplaces that have better sports facilities have a lower risk of developing Capitalize word
News
health
problems
.
In conclusion, the increasing prevalence of a sedentary lifestyle
presents serious health
problems
. However
, by creating more opportunities for physical activities in people’s daily routine
, Fix the agreement mistake
routines
this
issue can be mitigated.Submitted by akzharkynzhamal on
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task achievement
The essay should maintain a consistent level of formality and avoid informal phrasing, such as 'way more health risks.' Consider using 'significantly higher health risks' instead.
task achievement
Try to elaborate a bit more on specific solutions, such as examples of special tools that workplaces could use for physical training, like treadmill desks or stretching stations.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea and that the transition between ideas is smooth. This could be improved by adding transition words or phrases between paragraphs to enhance the flow of the essay.
coherence cohesion
Make sure the conclusion effectively summarizes the key points discussed in the essay, and if possible, offer a brief statement on the importance of addressing sedentary lifestyles for the future well-being of society.
task achievement
The essay clearly identifies the main issue of the sedentary lifestyle and links it directly to health problems.
task achievement
Specific examples and data, such as the research from the Baylor College of Medicine and the BBC news report, are effectively used to underline and support the points made.
coherence cohesion
The essay is well-organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, making it easy to follow the author's line of reasoning.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.