The government should be responsible for providing retirees with financial support and care. While many people think that citizens should save money to take care of themselves when they are old. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Retirement
is a significant phase in life where financial stability is crucial. There are different opinions on who should be responsible for providing financial
support
to
retirees
. Some believe it is the
government
's duty,
while
others argue that
individuals
should save money to take care of themselves in old age. In
this
essay, I will discuss both views and give my opinion. One view is that the
government
should provide financial
support
to
retirees
.
First,
this
would ensure a social safety net for all citizens, especially those who are unable to save enough during their working years.
For example
, low-income workers may not have the means to save for
retirement
.
Second,
it promotes equality and fairness in society. Everyone, regardless of their income level, would have access to financial
support
in old age.
Finally
, it can contribute to economic stability, as
retirees
with secure incomes are more likely to spend money, thereby boosting the economy.
On the other hand
, some
people
think that
individuals
should save money for their
retirement
. They argue that personal responsibility is important. Each person should plan and save for their future needs.
Moreover
, it allows for freedom of choice.
People
can decide how much they want to save and how they want to spend their
retirement
funds.
Additionally
, it reduces the burden on
government
resources. If more
people
save for themselves, the
government
can use its funds for other important areas like healthcare and education. In my opinion, there should be a balance between both approaches. The
government
should provide a basic level of financial
support
to ensure that no one falls into poverty in their old age. At the same time,
individuals
should
also
be encouraged to save for their
retirement
to supplement
this
support
.
For instance
, the
government
can offer tax incentives for
retirement
savings to motivate
people
to save more. In conclusion, both the
government
and
individuals
have roles to play in providing financial
support
for
retirees
.
While
the
government
can ensure a safety net for all,
individuals
should
also
take responsibility for their own financial future. A combined approach can help achieve a secure and dignified
retirement
for everyone.
Submitted by chartakinnovation on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Ensure that examples provided are detailed and varied to strengthen your argument further. While the example of low-income workers is relevant, more diverse scenarios could be included.
coherence cohesion
Try to use more sophisticated linking devices to enhance the flow of the essay. While the essay is coherent, varied use of connectors and cohesive devices could improve the overall reading experience.
task achievement
The essay provides a clear and comprehensive response to the task, discussing both viewpoints effectively and offering a well-reasoned opinion.
coherence cohesion
The structure is logical, with a strong introduction, well-developed main points, and a conclusive ending that ties the essay together nicely.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • government responsibility
  • financial support
  • care
  • retirees
  • personal responsibility
  • retirement planning
  • social security
  • pension
  • benefits
  • concerns
  • dependency
  • adequate savings
  • elderly citizens
  • burden
  • welfare system
  • poverty
  • social safety net
  • financial stability
  • public funds
  • sustainable
  • reliable
  • case study
  • Japan
  • Sweden
  • United States
What to do next:
Look at other essays: