Some people think that schools are no longer necessary because people can acquire information on the Internet. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
It is argued that nowadays schools are not important for
people
because we cannot get any resources on Websites. This
essay totally agrees with that statement because people
will not need to learn subjects
that are not crucial to them and on the Internet
, people
can learn more than in schools.
To commence with, people
do not have to study things that they don't need. Every school teach children a lot of subjects
and there will be subjects
that will not be important in future. For example
, in Kazakhstan, we have an exam so called UBT and this
exam contains subjects
that you will need in your future job this
exam you only need two subjects
. In that case, we study a huge number of things for nothing.
Furthermore
, the Internet
can give us more valuable information than school teachers. The devices can do whatever you want and learning something is very easy. For instance
, when we learn some formula in Math, I don't really get it and we do not have any person to ask other than a teacher. Of course, she explains it to us but I already don't get it. For that reason, when I get home, I learn and watch some videos in that syllabus and learn it quickly.
In conclusion, people
think that there is no need to go to school because we have the Internet
and we can learn more qualitative information and we can acquire the things that we need. It predicted that the government would think about teaching on the Internet
.Submitted by Kawasaki on
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relevant specific examples
Ensure all ideas are fully developed and supported with specific examples or evidence. The essay provides a general response to the task but could benefit from more detailed and varied examples.
logical structure
Try to make sure that all parts of your argument are clearly explained and logically connected. For example, the transition from discussing the irrelevance of school subjects to the benefits of internet learning can be more seamless.
Work on grammatical accuracy and word choice to improve clarity. For instance,
clear comprehensive ideas
It is important to thoroughly proofread your essay. Minor grammatical errors and awkward phrasing can detract from the overall clarity of your argument. Reading more academic articles and essays can help improve sentence structure and word choice.
clear comprehensive ideas
Your essay provides a clear statement of your opinion and consistent focus on the topic throughout the essay.
introduction conclusion present
The introduction and conclusion are well-crafted, effectively framing the discussion.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?