People in major cities suffer from high levels of air pollution, causing health problems for many. What are the main reasons for this? What can be done to solve this problem?
In today’s society, environmental
issues
highly affect urban sides. One
such
problem
is individuals in towns are affected by high levels of air
pollution
, leading to health issues
for many. In this
essay, I will explore the causes of this
problem
and provide practical and effective solutions.
One
prominent problem
for individuals in major towns who suffer from high levels of air
pollution
is because the number of vehicles
increasing in town
. To illustrate this
, nowadays everyone has at least one
vehicle in their home. Therefore
, traffic happens in urban areas, which is one
of the major reasons for air
pollution
. For example
, according to
Time of India newspaper, Bangalore air
is polluted 50% of due to
the high usage of vehicles
.
Secondly
, garbage
wastage. In brief, wastages are fired by individuals without knowing the harmful of that. Therefore
, it will create air
pollution
and cause health problems such
as asthma and wheezing issues
for people.
The solution to solve this
problem
is to introduce electric vehicles
in town
. In brief, electrical vehicles
reduce air
pollution
and it is eco-friendly. Recycling the garbage
. Further
, the government should propose new factories and machines to recycle the garbage
without fire. For instance
, In Japan, one
of the companies, called Jeak gives electric bikes to their employees to reduce air
pollution
. It is one
of the examples for other countries.
In conclusion, the problems such
as the vehicles
increasing in town
and garbage
wastage require immediate action and attention. Adapting the proposed solutions like Introducing electric vehicles
in town
and recycling the garbage
will resolve these issues
. And the amount of health problems also
be reduced.Submitted by shruthiudhai7 on
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coherence cohesion
While your introduction and conclusion are clear and suitable, providing a comprehensive overview, the body paragraphs need a bit more logical structure. Ensure that the ideas flow seamlessly from one to another.
task achievement
You have addressed the task well by identifying main reasons and proposing solutions. However, some of your points could be elaborated further to enhance comprehensiveness, such as the impact of solutions like electric vehicles and recycling.
coherence cohesion
Some points could use more cohesive devices to improve the flow. For example, instead of jumping from one idea to the next, use phrases like 'moreover,' 'in addition,' or 'consequently' to connect your points more smoothly.
coherence cohesion
Your essay maintains a clear structure, with a solid introduction and conclusion.
task achievement
You have identified relevant main reasons for air pollution and provided practical solutions, which shows a good understanding of the topic.
task achievement
Using examples like the one from 'Time of India' and the Japanese company makes your arguments more convincing and grounded in reality.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
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