IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Car ownership has increased so rapidly over the past thirty years that many cities in the world are now 'one big traffic jam’’ How true do you think this statement is? What are measures can the government take to discourage people from using their cars?

#car #ownership #thirty #years #cities #world #traffic #jam’’ #measures #government #people #cars
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In the
last
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 thirty years ,
a
Change the article
the
show examples
number
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 of buying private
cars
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 has increased, which has become
a
Correct article usage
the
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 main reason for traffic in most of the cities in the whole world. I totally agree with the statement because it is happening in each and every country. I will discuss the essential steps that can be taken by the authorities to overcome
this
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 problem . There are various reasons why I believe that traffic jams have been increasing day by day.
Firstly
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, I was living in Delhi, which is one of the largest populated cities in India.Most of the people there are working , so they are eager to save their
time
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 by buying their own vehicles. They know travelling by bus or any other public transportation is not providing the services they need to save
time
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 because the timings are not suitable for a working person. They just cannot wait half an hour for the bus to reach a 20-minute destination.For all these reasons push them to get their own vehicles.
For example
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, when I was living there I was having so many issues with transportation and I bought my own scooter to go to work or any other place at a
time
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. There are multifarious actions that the government can take to solve
this
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 issue .The first and foremost solution is that the Local authority should provide a better public vehicle to the citizens of the country ,
such
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 as good bus timings .Buses should be available after 2-5 minutes so it will help the masses to save their
time
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 by not waiting too long for the buses.
As a result
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, folks will prefer to take buses
instead
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 of buying their own
cars
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.
Moreover
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 , the government should arrange some programs to educate the community about the environmental pollution which is increasing because of car fuel . If people know about these kinds of things it will be helpful to reduce the
number
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 of private
cars
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 , bikes and scooters on the road.
Thirdly
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, national leaders should implement a law that forces people to use
cars
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 by their even or odd
number
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 plates on days specified by Authorities. In conclusion,
Although
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 there are various causes behind the traffic jams, some important measures can be applied by the government to reduce the
number
Use synonyms
 of private vehicles on the road.
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coherence cohesion
Ensure variety in sentence structures to enrich the essay and demonstrate command over complex constructions.
task achievement
Elaborate slightly more on certain points to enhance clarity and depth; for instance, address how the proposed solutions like better bus timings or education programs directly impact car ownership reduction.
task achievement
It might be helpful to include a counterargument or acknowledge potential challenges to proposed solutions, thereby demonstrating critical thinking and depth.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
task achievement
The writer stays on topic and provides relevant examples to support their points, such as their personal experience in Delhi.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • traffic congestion
  • air pollution
  • commute times
  • urban areas
  • infrastructure
  • public transport systems
  • congestion charges
  • alternative modes of transport
  • cycling
  • walking
  • fuel taxes
  • carpooling
  • electric vehicles
  • traffic jams
  • mitigate
What to do next:
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