IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people think that the increasing use of computers and mobile phones for communication hurts young people's reading and writing skills. Do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Some are of the view that increasing
use
Correct article usage
the use
show examples
 of mobile devices and computers for communication has a detrimental impact
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
 young
people
Use synonyms
's language ability. I oppose
this
Linking Words
 fact and believe it has benefited many young generations to improve their skills fast. Advancement of technology has seen the emergence of many communication tools which are freely available in the market.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, software applications like "Gramerly" have
open
Wrong verb form
opened
show examples
 the way
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 anyone to improve their writing skills.
This
Linking Words
 not only trains you to improve your grammar and dictation
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 but
also
Linking Words
 suggests improvements which can be beneficial for future improvements.
Moreover
Linking Words
, applications like "Kindle" have helped readers to read books in their curriculum through an audio assistant program which has encouraged more readers to obtain new books.
In addition
Linking Words
 to
this
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 has paved the way to learn new languages easily.
For example
Linking Words
, there is an increased number
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 young subscribers for "FrenchPod", an application which helps anyone to learn and write basic French which is crucial for success. Integration of Artificial l Intelligence is one more aspect which has contributed towards
this
Linking Words
 trend in young
people
Use synonyms
.
Firstly
Linking Words
, anyone can quickly link with an AI program to support writing a report instantly.
This
Linking Words
 has helped many hard-working students who are juggling back and forth in subjects to finish their assignments fast.
Secondly
Linking Words
, researchers have found that young
people
Use synonyms
's cognitive ability and brain capacity will improve with the integration of technology into their curriculum. In conclusion, even though many
people
Use synonyms
 are blindfolded by the idea that
usage
Correct article usage
the usage
show examples
 of mobile devices and computers is impacting young
people
Use synonyms
's language capability, results and sources show
otherwise
Linking Words
 that it only helps them to improve to be better.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Ensure that your main points are well elaborated with more specific and varied examples. For instance, expand on how AI improves cognitive abilities.
task response
Work on making your argument more compelling by providing counterarguments and refuting them.
coherence cohesion
Use transitional phrases more effectively to improve the logical flow of the essay. This will make it easier for the reader to follow your argument.
coherence cohesion
Pay attention to minor grammatical and stylistic errors. While they don't overshadow the main points, fixing them can polish your essay further.
task response
Your introduction clearly states your position, which sets a strong foundation for the essay.
task response
You've effectively used applications like Grammarly, Kindle, and FrenchPod to support your argument, making your examples highly relevant.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, providing good structure.
coherence cohesion
Your points are generally well organized and cohesive, making the essay easy to follow.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: