Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

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In today’s world, the number of children who allocate most part of their day to using handsets is increasing sharply.
Although
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the development of technology can be very useful somehow, I strongly believe that its drawbacks outweigh the benefits, and in
this
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essay, I will discuss why.
To begin
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with, I think parents have crucial impacts on their children’s behaviour including the correct way of using cell phones. Unfortunately, nowadays most parents use smart devices as a babysitter to keep their kids amused and busy, so they have time for their own activities.
Besides
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, infants and teenagers find smartphones interesting and exciting.
Accordingly
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, visual media replace any other recreational hobbies
such
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as playing outdoors, board games or any sort of sport. In Iran, during the past decade, using mobile phones has occupied a significant time of a kid’s daily life and the most vital cause of
this
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issue has been stated as negligence of parents to upbringing their children. The major negative effects of wild usage of these devices can be the diminished creativity in infants and the occurrence of violent behaviour among adolescents.
According to
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the new research conducted on kindergartens, children under 7 years of age who spend most of their free time using smartphones, show less flexibility and creativity in their daily practices.
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, plenty of cruel and rough acts have been seen among teenagers who spend the main part of their day watching movies on social media. In conclusion, like any other cutting-edge technology, smartphones have a number of advantages.
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, if we aren’t able to control the young generation, a devastating situation will happen in the near future that proves the losses of smart devices aren’t worth their merits.
Submitted by mahtaesmailian on

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task achievement
Expand on the reasons why children find smartphones interesting. Perhaps include examples of specific activities they engage in on smartphones.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph develops a single main idea clearly and that these ideas are explicitly linked to the essay question.
introduction and conclusion present
You have provided a clear introduction and conclusion, which effectively frame your essay.
supported main points
The main points, such as the role of parents and the negative effects on children, are supported with relevant examples and logical reasoning.
logical structure
Your essay structure is logical, making it easy to follow your line of reasoning.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • smartphones
  • usage
  • technology
  • accessibility
  • convenience
  • entertainment
  • gaming
  • social media
  • communication
  • educational resources
  • addiction
  • dependence
  • negative effects
  • physical health
  • mental health
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