Extreme sports such as sky diving and skiing are very dangerous and should be banned. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#sports #sky

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There is a notion that

sports

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,which are considered dangerous,should be prohibited.I completely disagree with

this

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view,as it damages tourism in some regions and violates the

rights

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of sportsmen. Banning extreme

sports

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can seriously damage particular regions where businesses rely on providing opportunities for these activities.

For example

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,bungee jumping and skiing,types of adrenaline

sports

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, usually take place in mountainous areas,where there is a significant population residing with only

this

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type of income.

Moreover

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,these

sports

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create a sense of identity and community for

people

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living in remote areas.

However

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,enacting prohibition for holding events related to extreme

sports

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will lead to mass unemployment and movement to cities in search of new jobs.

While

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I concede that it might be dangerous for the lives of citizens to participate in extreme

sports

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,I believe it is an obvious act of violation of human

rights

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.The right to choose how we spend our leisure time,even if it involves risk,is necessary for a free society.

People

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should be able to choose and follow their interests without any interference from the government.

Instead

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,the authority should take responsibility for ensuring the quality of equipment and encourage

people

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to follow the safety rules.These acts from the government will make its citizens more informed about the dangers of

sports

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and can lead to rational decisions without any violations of

rights

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To conclude

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,I believe that the approach of prohibiting participation in extreme

sports

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would not only harm local economies and businesses but

also

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violate individual's

rights

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to choose.

Instead

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of banning,the government should focus on ensuring the safety and awareness of its

people

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rank it as in IELTS

Submitted by yerlepesov on Sun Sep 01 2024

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task achievement

Your response is clear and present throughout the essay. However, further elaboration on opposing views, alongside more specific examples, could enhance your argument.

coherence cohesion

Your essay has a good structure, with clear introduction and conclusion. Linking words and phrases could be varied to improve the flow of the text.

coherence cohesion

While your main points are strong and supported, further detail could make your argument even more compelling.

task achievement

The essay answers the prompt well and addresses the main points effectively.

coherence cohesion

There is a clear logical progression from one idea to the next, enhancing readability.

coherence cohesion

The introduction and conclusion are well-defined and summarize the argument effectively.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

260 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

adrenaline rush
risk threshold
thrill-seeking
safety protocols
hazard assessment
adventure tourism
regulatory framework
personal autonomy
informed consent
risk mitigation strategies
thrill-seeking behavior
protective gear
extreme athleticism
freedom of choice
accident prevalence
emergency response
courage and resilience
endorphin release
legal implications
peer pressure effects

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Extreme sports such as sky diving and skiing are very dangerous and should be banned. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Fully explain your ideas

The personal information of many individuals is held by large internet companies and organisations. Do you think the advantages of this outweight the disadvantages?

Social media marketing can influence what consumers buy. Do you agree or disagree? To what extent do you agree?

Nowdays, more and more people don't wear their national clothes, and the clothes look almost the same all over the world. Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Acquiring new knowledge and skills doesn't always happen quickly. Do you think that patience is key when it comes to learning, or do you think it is possible to learn things quickly if you are motivated? Support your opinion with your personal experience and observation.

In many countries nowadays, more and more women have full-time jobs as men, so there is logic that men and women should share the housework tasks equally. To what extent do you agree or disagree?