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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The chart below shows the movement of people from rural to urban areas in three countries and predictions for future years. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below shows the movement of people from rural to urban areas in three countries and predictions for future years. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#movement #people #areas #three #countries #predictions #future #years #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The line graph depicts the shift of
people
Use synonyms
 from rural to urban areas in three unknown countries between
Use synonyms
years
Correct article usage
the years
show examples
 2000 and 2025.
Overall
Linking Words
, the
number
Use synonyms
 of
people
Use synonyms
 in those countries constantly
increase
Correct subject-verb agreement
increases
show examples
 from time to time. In 2000,
Country
Use synonyms
 A started
at
Change preposition
with
show examples
 18
million
Use synonyms
people
Use synonyms
 who moved.
Then
Linking Words
, in 2005, the
number
Use synonyms
 steadily up to around 36
million
Use synonyms
people
Use synonyms
. After that, in 2010, there
are
Wrong verb form
were
show examples
 41
million
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people
Use synonyms
 who moved to cities. In predictions, the
number
Use synonyms
 will
remainly
Correct your spelling
remain
 rise
until
Change preposition
by
show examples
 2025.
Besides
Linking Words
 that, there is a
Country
Use synonyms
 B. In 2000, from
years
Use synonyms
 2000 to 2020, the
number
Use synonyms
 was significantly rose. Begin with 10
million
Use synonyms
people
Use synonyms
 to 30
million
Use synonyms
people
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, the
number
Use synonyms
 will remain steadily in
Use synonyms
years
Correct article usage
the years
show examples
 2020 until 2025.
Last
Linking Words
country
Use synonyms
,
initially
Linking Words
,
Country
Use synonyms
 C was the lowest with only about 5
million
Use synonyms
people
Use synonyms
 who shifted. Even, in 2005, the
number
Use synonyms
still
Add a missing verb
was still
show examples
 below 20
million
Use synonyms
people
Use synonyms
. But, suddenly
climb
Wrong verb form
climbed
show examples
 and the
number
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become
Wrong verb form
became
show examples
 bigger and bigger.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the prediction for future
years
Use synonyms
, the
number
Use synonyms
 of
people
Use synonyms
 who are moving to cities in
Country
Use synonyms
 C will more
large
Correct word choice
larger
show examples
 than two other countries.
Submitted by wishmeluck  on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words people, years, number, country, million with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "moved" was used 2 times.
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