Many social media accounts are fake. What problems does this cause? What solutions can you suggest?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In these days and ages, there is a phenomenon that there are many
accounts
on the social platforms fabricated.
This
problem is attributable to the misinformation and the scam on the network, but it can be tackled by strict censorship from the cybersecurity checkers. The underlying root of the problem is the increase in misstatements on social media. To be more specific, these users will upload false news or gutter presses on these platforms in order to manipulate the citizen's awareness or increase the interaction on the networks.
Moreover
, some individuals used fake
accounts
to cheat in the election. Take the election of the new president in the USA as a prime example, many city-dwellers utilise fake
accounts
to control the results of the election. Another factor may be the fraud on publicity, many fraudsters tend to organize the group on social, and
then
they will use the influence of the legit organization in order to scam the money from users.
As a result
Add a comma
,
show examples
the legit organization will be notorious directly. In Vietnam, there are many fraud cases which can be noticed
such
as donating to impoverished areas. They create a website for donating and transfer all the money to their own bank account. Perhaps the effective solution to scratch the itch is that all the
posts
should be allowed by the check from the administrator. To explain that the
posts
from each individual must be allowed not only the principle of the public but
also
the authenticity.
As a result
, the number of fake
accounts
will decrease annually. As far as Facebook, the moderator must investigate all the information from those
posts
if these
posts
do not reach the standard of the principle, these
cotent
Correct your spelling
content
moderatorscotent moderators will cancel the post and ban the users. In conclusion, there are many
accounts
on social platforms that are fabricated.
This
problem is attributable to the misinformation and the scam on the network, but it can be tackled by strict censorship from the cybersecurity checkers.
Submitted by Nghỉ hè vui vẻ cả nhà on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
To enhance coherence, link your ideas more clearly between paragraphs. For example, transition phrases like 'Additionally', 'Furthermore', or 'Moreover' can guide the reader through your points in a more seamless way.
coherence cohesion
Try to simplify your sentences for clarity. Some sentences are overly complex, leading to confusion. Breaking down complex ideas into smaller, more digestible parts can help make your argument clearer.
task achievement
While your introduction effectively sets up the essay, ensure that your main points are directly responding to the prompt. Ensure each paragraph tackles different aspects of the problems and solutions clearly linked to fake social media accounts.
task achievement
Your examples are helpful and relevant, but try expanding them with more context or analysis for better support of your points. For instance, explain why fake accounts influencing an election is significant and how it impacts society.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction clearly presents the topic and sets the stage for the rest of the essay, which is excellent.
task achievement
The use of real-world examples such as the US election and fraud cases in Vietnam add authenticity and credibility to your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Your conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and restates your position, providing a strong ending to your essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: