Many young people are leaving the countryside to live in cities leaving behind an elderly population. What are the problems associated with this? What can be done about it?

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There is no denying that the younger
population
leaves their rural
areas
to live in a big city and leave over their older family member.
this
can have many negative effects on society. Firmly, I believe that it can be coped with different strategies. There are myriads of reasons that youngster moves on
countryside
Add an article
the countryside
show examples
.
Firstly
, lack of employment issue because
people
need money for survival.
However
,
people
want modernism and are full of resources.
Secondly
, lack of facilities like medical, and social services, water problems, and electricity
due to
the reason
people
move to the urban
areas
and do not focus on their older parents.
For example
,
South
Change preposition
in South
show examples
Korea, a huge amount
population
is moving toward Seoul because the employment rate is higher and good salary packages.
According to
big cities, more and more
people
shift from rural to urban
areas
. children should take care of their parents but unfortunately, nowadays they are not considered their parents as family members. probing ahead, it will be solved by the government because higher authorities provide jobs in rural
areas
like in farming and in crops that help to increase the GDP or reduce the tax on the rural
population
.
For instance
, New Zealand increased the employment ratio in villages and reduced their extra payments, providing allowances that helped to improve the quality of crops.
however
, by developing infrastructure, supporting local businesses, and promoting tourism, they can make rural
areas
more attractive to young
people
. The government should help older
people
and provide pensions for older than 65 age
people
.
to sum up
, increasing the ratio of jobs increases the stability of the
population
in a rural area
while
providing opportunities to rural communities. I think these types of changes show diverse changes in the living style and reduce pollution on the urban side.
Submitted by alviusman18 on

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introduction conclusion present
In your introduction, you should clearly state the main aspects that you will discuss in the essay. This will help give the reader a clear idea of what to expect.
supported main points
Ensure that each idea is fully developed with supporting details and examples. For instance, when discussing the reasons young people move to cities, give more detailed examples and analysis.
logical structure
Linking words and phrases such as 'moreover', 'however', and 'therefore' should be varied to enhance cohesion and make your argument flow more logically.
complete response
You have made a good attempt at addressing both parts of the task by discussing the problems associated with young people leaving the countryside and suggesting possible solutions.
logical structure
Your essay shows a clear sense of organization and structure, with separate paragraphs dedicated to different aspects of the issue.
relevant specific examples
You provided relevant specific examples, like the example of South Korea and New Zealand, which strengthen your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • aging population
  • healthcare and social services
  • economic decline
  • workforce
  • labor shortages
  • local economies
  • vitality
  • cultural heritage
  • traditions
  • cultural identity
  • infrastructure
  • supporting local businesses
  • promoting tourism
  • access to quality education and healthcare
  • incentive programs
  • tax breaks
  • housing incentives
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