Topic – Some people believe that educational success depends on good teachers, while others believe that students’ attitude are important. Discuss both the views and give your opinion.
Some men and women think that educational success is related to good educators who have important responsibilities in teaching
students
, whilst others think that Use synonyms
students
' desires for learning are more fundamental. I agree with the second group because I believe that someone who doesn't have a chance to have a proper teacher can Use synonyms
also
make great achievements.
Linking Words
Firstly
, Linking Words
teachers
have very important responsibilities for their Use synonyms
students
because they choose to educate people. They should not only teach them but Use synonyms
also
they should improve themselves day by day because there are always new developments in the world. Linking Words
Therefore
, they should keep up with these changes to catch the current improvements. Linking Words
However
, they need to be paid properly unless people want them to quit their occupations. Linking Words
For example
, lots of good Linking Words
teachers
prefer to work in private Use synonyms
schools
which are more expensive than public Use synonyms
schools
because they believe that they can earn more money to survive. Use synonyms
Also
, private Linking Words
schools
can afford good Use synonyms
teachers
because parents give money to them for the best educators. Because of that, with more salaries, they desire to be better in their professions. Use synonyms
Hence
, the Linking Words
students
can be more successful in their classes when they have better sources to learn.
Use synonyms
On the other hand
, there are many successful Linking Words
students
who don't have the opportunity to afford a private school because of poverty. In Use synonyms
this
situation, they have to go to the public Linking Words
schools
which include lower qualified Use synonyms
teachers
than the private ones. Use synonyms
However
, those children can still achieve their goals if they have enough ambitions and desires to study. Linking Words
For example
, it can be seen that there are lots of great children who can go to very famous colleges after finishing public Linking Words
schools
, especially in developing countries. Even if they don't have the right opportunities, they can be able to succeed in their school life with hard work.
In conclusion, there are two different approaches to educational success. Some individuals believe that a good teacher is more important to success whilst others believe that succession is related to the attitudes of the Use synonyms
students
. In my opinion, individuals who want to achieve their goals, Use synonyms
they
can do it by working hard.Correct pronoun usage
apply
Submitted by bloodylady on
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph flows smoothly into the next. Using linking words and phrases can help with this.
task achievement
Provide more varied and detailed examples to support your points. This will make your arguments more convincing.
task achievement
Be mindful of minor grammatical errors and awkward phrases. Proofreading can help catch these issues.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, providing a well-rounded discussion of both views and offering your own opinion.
task achievement
The main points in the essay are supported with relevant examples, which help to illustrate your arguments.
task achievement
Your response is complete and covers the task requirements, discussing both views and giving your opinion.