in many countries, paying for things using mobile phones (cellphone) apps is becoming increasingly common. does this development have more advantages or more disadvantages?

#countries #phones #cellphone #apps #development

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This

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essay will discuss the positive and negative aspects of paying with electronic devices and argue why the advantages are superior. Whilst acknowledging that there are drawbacks,

this

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essay will argue the advantages of cashless transactions outweigh the disadvantages. On the one hand, there are obvious disadvantages,

such

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as losing the sense of the value of

money

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due to

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not having it physically in your hands.

Moreover

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, moving into a cashless world

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apply

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gives more power to the government by controlling all your transactions and having a record in your bank statements.

For instance

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, if you want to spend your capital on things that politicians do not like you to spend, you will not be able to do it anymore in a cashless world.

On the other hand

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, we can see many pros, like not having to carry notes in your pocket, something that many people avoid nowadays because of the chances of losing

money

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. A clear example, a

statistic

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statistics

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have shown that 20% of the

money

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of the entire world's population has been lost accidentally from their pockets.

Furthermore

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, another advantage is the control you have over your spending when you have records of your transactions in your online banking, helping many people have a better understanding of their finances.

To sum up

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this

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essay discussed the pros and cons associated with paying with electronic

money

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While

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there are clearly disadvantages, in

this

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case, I would probably say that not having to carry

money

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and having control of your spending outweigh the negative aspects of

this

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Submitted by jimeilaria on Sat Sep 14 2024

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coherence cohesion

To improve coherence and cohesion, work on ensuring your points flow more smoothly from one to the next. Use more transitional phrases to link ideas and ensure that each paragraph logically follows the one before it.

task achievement

For task achievement, provide more specific data or examples to support your points. For instance, citing concrete studies or statistical data will strengthen your argument.

introduction

The essay effectively introduces the topic and clearly states the position it will argue, which provides a strong start.

conclusion

Conclusion effectively summarizes the arguments made and reinforces the writer's position, which provides a coherent ending to the essay.

coherence cohesion

The main points in the essay are relevant to the topic and provide a balanced discussion of both advantages and disadvantages.

task achievement

Uses specific examples like the statistics about lost money to support points, although more detailed data could further strengthen the argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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9
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

256 words

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in many countries, paying for things using mobile phones (cellphone) apps is becoming increasingly common. does this development have more advantages or more disadvantages?

Fully explain your ideas

Space travel has been possible for some time. Some people think space tourism could be developed in the future which can help to develop countries' economies. To what extent do you think this is a positive or negative development ?

Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In education and employment, some people work harder than others. Why do some people work harder? Is it always a good thing to work hard?

What are the pros and cons of using public transport ?