Nowadays it is easy to apply for and be given a credit card. However, some people experience problems when they are not able to pay their debt back. In your opinion, do the advantages of credit cards outweigh the disadvantages?

These days, applying
and
Change preposition
for and
show examples
getting a credit
card
has become easier than before,
although
some individuals face difficulties when they are not able to pay their debt back. In my view point, they have more beneficial points than negatives, and in
this
essay, I will support my opinion with relevant examples. First and foremost, one of the benefits of
this
is that it is safer than cash. What I mean by
this
is that you can deposit and save your money in it without worrying about it. Yet, it has password and other security options, which is more reliable than cash.
For instance
, if someone steals your
card
, they cannot use it, and
moreover
, you can discredit that
card
and get a new one from the bank. Another striking point of having
this
is that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
you can purchase items from online shops or pay, without going to the bank.
In other words
, these cards have made our work quicker and easier.
For example
, many people order and buy their stuff from
Amazon
Correct article usage
the Amazon
show examples
website, which prevents them from travelling long distances.
As a result
, it helps individuals save more money and not waste them for transportation.
On the other hand
, there is an argument that some humans might see difficulties when they cannot pay back their debts.
This
is because when they are in debt, the bank automatically gets their money from their account when their income is paid.
As a consequence
, they cannot buy their essential needs which are food, drinks and others. The statistics demonstrate that over %60 of individuals, suffer from
this
issue. In conclusion, the circumstances for having a credit
card
have become so much easier than past. It has many benefits
such
as the security and online paying option,
however
, some issues are involved as well. In my view, despite the problems, it is a necessity for every person.
Submitted by Ah.mahdavi1365 on

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task achievement
Refine the introduction by clearly stating the advantages and disadvantages that will be discussed in the essay. Provide a clear thesis statement that answers the question directly.
task achievement
Back up each main point with more specific and varied examples, data, or cases to strengthen the argument and make your essay more persuasive.
coherence cohesion
Improve the logical structure by using a wider range of cohesive devices and linking words between sentences and paragraphs to show the relationship between ideas more clearly.
coherence cohesion
Ensure the conclusion succinctly summarizes the main points of the essay and restates your position, demonstrating a clear final analysis.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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