Extreme sports such as sky diving and skiing are very dangerous and should be banned. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#sports #sky

Some

people

argue that extreme

sports

such

sky diving

Correct your spelling

skydiving

show examples

and skiing are dangerous,

therefore

, these

games

should be banned. I personally disagree with

this

statement because these

sports

are admired by

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

adventure-loving

people

, and if proper safety measures can be taken these

sports

can be played safely. Extreme

sports

are

the

Correct article usage

show examples

source of joy for some adventurers. Those who love to take risks and overcome fear as a source of joy, enjoy skiing and

sky diving

Correct your spelling

skydiving

show examples

However

, some

people

do not approve

these

Change preposition

of these

show examples

games

because there are higher life risks.

However

, if proper measures can be taken, these fears can be overcome.

For example

people

from the UK, every year participate in sky diving

competition

Fix the agreement mistake

competitions

show examples

and they win prizes. Safety rules are very strict in

this

competition,

therefore

, no accident has

been take

Wrong verb form

taken

show examples

place yet.

Moreover

, if these

games

get banned,

people

who love to enjoy these

games

cannot enjoy

Correct pronoun usage

them

show examples

anymore. These

games

teach

people

to overcome fear and take challenges in life.

Moreover

, participating in these

games

requires a lot of practice and

hardwork

Correct your spelling

hard work

therefore

, it

help

Change the verb form

helps

show examples

the participants to take part in extreme physical activities.

Thus

it helps to improve

people

's health. I personally believe that banning extreme

sports

is not a good solution. Rather,

people

should be encouraged to take part in these

games

Submitted by rahman_rehana on Tue Sep 17 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

While your stance is clear, ensure a more thorough exploration of both sides of the argument to provide a balanced discussion. Additionally, delve deeper into specific examples and provide more detailed evidence to back up your points.

coherence cohesion

Ensure smoother transitions between paragraphs for better flow. Use cohesive devices and linking words more effectively to connect your ideas. Consider each paragraph's role in relation to the overall argument and aim for a more cohesive structure.

coherence cohesion

Enhance your introduction by outlining the structure of your essay. This will give the reader a clear idea of what to expect and improve the logical flow.

task achievement

Your essay has a clear and consistent stance on the topic, showing a solid understanding of your position.

coherence cohesion

The structure of your essay, including the introduction and conclusion, remains clear and provides direction for the reader.

task achievement

You effectively mention the importance of safety measures and the benefits of extreme sports, providing a basis for your argument.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Grammar mistakes
 

3 paragraphs

220 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

adrenaline rush
risk threshold
thrill-seeking
safety protocols
hazard assessment
adventure tourism
regulatory framework
personal autonomy
informed consent
risk mitigation strategies
thrill-seeking behavior
protective gear
extreme athleticism
freedom of choice
accident prevalence
emergency response
courage and resilience
endorphin release
legal implications
peer pressure effects

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6
band
It is human nature that discover unknown situations. In the last decades, scientists have become more excited when reach the moon. This essay will discuss why people find this issue ridiculous despite scientist's arguments
It is human nature that discover unknown situations. In the last decades, scientists have become more excited when reach the moon. This essay will discuss why individuals find this issue ridiculous despite scientist's arguments
5
band
Some people think that for robots are very important to you human future development. other think that they are dangerous and have negative effect on society discuss both view and give your opinion.
Many individuals argue that automatic robots will be a significant part of human development in the upcoming time,whereas others would say that, this situation has some detrimental effects on the community. In my view, it is mandatory to have robots for a smooth living life.This essay will argue that although robots help to maintain work-life balance and fewer chances of errors, they create unemployment as well as reduce physical activities for people.
4.5
band
Plastic bags, plastic bottles and plastic packaging are bad for the environment. What damage does plastic do the environment? What can be done by governments and individuals to solve this problem?
Plastic products are widely used all around the world for the storage purposes. Because plastic is not biodegradable, it has repercussions on the environment. This essay will discuss the dilemma cause by the plastic including global warming. This essay will also recommend solutions including alternatives, penalties, and responsibilities from the government and individuals sides.
6
band
There should be strict laws banning people from taking photographs of people under 18 in order to protect young celebrities and the children of celebrities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Undoubtedly, the question of whether strict laws should be enacted to prohibit the photography of individuals under 18, particularly young celebrities and children of celebrities, raises complex ethical and legal considerations. In this essay, I will examine the arguments both in favor of and against such legislation.
<4
band
The problem of homelessness is on the rise in several significant urban centers globally. What is the main cause of this problem and what measures could be taken to solve it by communities and governments?
The main cause of homelessness is jobless, having no job you will stay no where in place that dream of, because of that jobless is the problem for big city to be resolved. By any chance, jobless will effect not only to one person to whom have no job but also to his or her family such as husband or wife and kids they own. Many countries have strategy to take control the increasing of jobless, but somehow the impact of natural disaster like covid-19 affected to the economy growth. The rapid infection to the poeple effected to stop people for working, finally people do not have job then they can not rent house. The measure to solve homelessness is the state must have policy to provide job opportunity t the people, and also endorse if job opportunity will not asked many requirements.

Extreme sports such as sky diving and skiing are very dangerous and should be banned. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

It is human nature that discover unknown situations. In the last decades, scientists have become more excited when reach the moon. This essay will discuss why people find this issue ridiculous despite scientist's arguments

Some people think that for robots are very important to you human future development. other think that they are dangerous and have negative effect on society discuss both view and give your opinion.

Plastic bags, plastic bottles and plastic packaging are bad for the environment. What damage does plastic do the environment? What can be done by governments and individuals to solve this problem?

There should be strict laws banning people from taking photographs of people under 18 in order to protect young celebrities and the children of celebrities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The problem of homelessness is on the rise in several significant urban centers globally. What is the main cause of this problem and what measures could be taken to solve it by communities and governments?