Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for company or organisation. Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?

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Nowadays,
people
prefer to do their own work rather than doing a job in any company or organization.
This
is because
people
want to be free and the main drawback for
this
is that they will get into loss because they are not experienced.
To begin
with, these days
people
want to do their own work because they want to be free from taking orders. They know that they are not going to
fulfill
Change the spelling
fulfil
show examples
their dreams by doing a job.
For instance
, my brother is self-employed and he works whenever he wants to. He
fulfills
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fulfils
show examples
all his dreams and is free from taking orders. On the downside, there are some drawbacks
of
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to
show examples
being self-employed.
Firstly
,
people
start a business without getting any experience
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
that relevant field and
then
they get a loss and close their business.For illustration, my friend started a business online without learning anything about it and after some days he was
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
loss
Correct article usage
a loss
show examples
because he didn’t know what he
have
Wrong verb form
had
show examples
to do.
Secondly
, one who
became
Wrong verb form
becomes
show examples
a businessman has to work day and night and
therefore
, he
didn’t
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doesn’t
show examples
have enough time to spend with their family.
For Example
, My Father is a businessman and he is involved in his
buisness
Correct your spelling
business
so much that he has no time to
spent
Wrong verb form
spend
show examples
with us. In conclusion,
people
are moving towards self-employment because they are free to do whatever they want, but it has drawbacks that
people
don’t have enough time to spend with their family.
Submitted by sajeehulzamans on

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coherence cohesion
To improve coherence and cohesion, work on creating smoother transitions between sentences and paragraphs. Also, ensure each paragraph focuses on a single idea without jumping from one thought to another abruptly.
task achievement
For better task achievement, make sure to comprehensively cover all parts of the question. Balance the advantages and disadvantages more equally, and provide more detailed and precise examples that directly support your main points.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps in maintaining a good structure.
task achievement
The essay provides relevant examples which support the points being made, such as personal anecdotes about your brother and father.

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • self-employment
  • freelancing
  • entrepreneurship
  • autonomy
  • financial stability
  • work-life balance
  • financial insecurity
  • lack of support
  • resources
  • long working hours
  • uncertain income
  • job security
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