Modern technology has made it possible for people to view exhibitions at home, so museum and art galleries will disappear soon. To what extend do you agree or disagree?
It goes without saying that technology has changed our lives completely. It is being argued that tech gadgets will replace exhibitions and art galleries. I disagree with
this
statement because there are some reasons that will not let Linking Words
this
happen, like the feel that only can be felt at being at places like historical monuments and historical Linking Words
museums
that cannot be felt at sitting on a couch watching through monitors.
Use synonyms
To begin
with, modern technology has made it possible for children & adults to study and work respectively from home, but it is not capable enough to make a person feel emotional Linking Words
while
watching videos. Here, Linking Words
museums
play a significant role. Use synonyms
For example
, if a person has visited a historical or any other gallery, he/she will feel attached to those incidents that happened centuries ago by watching the belongings and weapons their ancestors had been using. When one sees them with one's own eyes and feels the texture of those things, it will create a bond between him/her and that thing. It feels attached to those historical events. Linking Words
However
, Linking Words
this
feeling cannot be felt through watching them with the help of tech gadgets.
Linking Words
Moreover
, Linking Words
museums
and other related occupations are a source of many individuals' livelihoods. So, it is not an easy thing that can be replaced with electronic devices. Many societies have been collecting funds to preserve these historical things for upcoming generations. Some Use synonyms
archeologists
do a great job collecting everything related to our past and sending them to Change the spelling
archaeologists
museums
and galleries, which cannot be possible with electronic gadgets.
Use synonyms
To conclude
, Linking Words
although
technology has made it possible to see anything from our mobile screens. Linking Words
However
, exhibitions that give us real experience cannot be replaced with technological instruments. So, it is recommended that people fund those platforms that are working to make these historical structures alive.Linking Words
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task achievement
Try to further elaborate on the points regarding the emotional connection and livelihood dependence on museums and galleries.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next one to improve overall flow.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which effectively frame your arguments.
task achievement
You have provided relevant and specific examples to support your main points.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure of your essay is strong, with each paragraph contributing to the overall argument.
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.