These days more fathers stay at home and take care of their children while mothers go out to work. What could be the reasons for this? Do you think it is a positive or a negative development?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Nowadays, more and more

men

Use synonyms

prefer taking on the role of househusbands,

while

Linking Words

women

Use synonyms

take care of financial aspects. There could be several reasons for

this

Linking Words

, and I believe it is a positive development. There are two main factors that contribute to

this

Linking Words

trend.

Firstly

Linking Words

, the growth of technology has created more occupations that are more suitable for

women

Use synonyms

such

Linking Words

as marketing, sales, and human resources.

Therefore

Linking Words

, more and more female employees earn more money than males,

thus

Linking Words

making them the breadwinners in their families. The second element is that our society has become more equal in terms of gender. These days,

women

Use synonyms

are legally allowed to pursue formal qualifications and desired careers. In the past,

this

Linking Words

privilege used to be only for

men

Use synonyms

, and their partners had to stay at home and take care of families. In my opinion, these changes should be seen as an essential move in the course of human history. Living in a society that promotes gender equality is beneficial not only for

women

Use synonyms

to no longer be under pressure to sacrifice their careers for the traditional role, but

also

Linking Words

for

men

Use synonyms

they are free to leave their jobs in order to spend time with their families as their wills.

Additionally

Linking Words

, promoting equality between

men

Use synonyms

and

women

Use synonyms

may lead to greater empathy. By switching roles, parents will have chances to encounter difficulties that their partners face every day.

Therefore

Linking Words

, they will be more empathetic towards their partners. In conclusion, I believe that the development of technology and society are the factors that contribute to the changing roles between

men

Use synonyms

and

women

Use synonyms

Consequently

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

trend has led to some desirable results.

ieltsamieduTue Sep 24 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

You have responded well to the task, providing a comprehensive answer to the question. However, including more specific examples could strengthen your points.

coherence cohesion

Your essay is logically structured and coherent. Linking words and phrases are generally used effectively, but make sure to maintain clarity with more complex ideas or longer sentences.

coherence cohesion

Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps frame your argument effectively.

task achievement

You have presented clear and comprehensive ideas that are relevant to the task question.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

275 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

breadwinner
caregiving
paternal leave
societal perceptions
gender roles
flexible working conditions
personal preference
father-child relationship
emotional and social development
household responsibilities
career opportunities
professional achievements
balanced parenting
earning potential
social stigma
societal pressure
discrimination
traditional mindsets
resentment
adjustment

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7.5
band
The rate of zoos in many countries has grown up, and it is commonly believed that they are cruel and ought to be banned. In my opinion, I disagree with this view because zoos can help animals in many different aspects.
The number of zoos in many countries has grown, and it is commonly believed that they are cruel and ought to be banned. In my opinion, I disagree with this view because zoos can help animals in many different aspects.
7
band
Some people think that children should start school at a very early age, but others believe that they should not go to school until they are older. Discuss both these views anf give your opinion
While some people believe that schooling should begin at an early age, others claim that children should learn when they become older. In my opinion, I strongly agree that they should start their learning process at a young age because they can absorb information quickly and develop multiple skills by learning. This essay will discuss both views and my opinion in detail.
6
band
Some people think that new houses should be built in the same style as the older houses in the local area. Others disagree and say local authorities should allow people to build houses in the style of their own choice. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
While some people argue that contemporary houses should be constructed in the same style as houses built in the past in local areas, others believe that residents should have a choice in deciding what style to choose. In my opinion, people should be allowed to decide what types of styles are to be used when constructing a building.
7
band
is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
In today's fast-paced world, people are encouraged to take risks, whether in their professional or personal lives, as it is often seen as a way to achieve success and growth. While there are certainly benefits to taking risks, there are also drawbacks that should be taken into account. In my opinion, however, taking risks and facing challenges bring more benefits that outweigh the potential demerits.
8
band
Most societies are based on rules and laws. If individuals were free to do whatever they wanted, society could not function. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
The life of the majority of the communities runs by the rules, which allow them to keep functioning. In contrast, the idea of the free will for each one may be detrimental for the society at large. I completely agree with this statement and want to discover some aspects in this essay.

These days more fathers stay at home and take care of their children while mothers go out to work. What could be the reasons for this? Do you think it is a positive or a negative development?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

The rate of zoos in many countries has grown up, and it is commonly believed that they are cruel and ought to be banned. In my opinion, I disagree with this view because zoos can help animals in many different aspects.

Some people think that children should start school at a very early age, but others believe that they should not go to school until they are older. Discuss both these views anf give your opinion

Some people think that new houses should be built in the same style as the older houses in the local area. Others disagree and say local authorities should allow people to build houses in the style of their own choice. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Most societies are based on rules and laws. If individuals were free to do whatever they wanted, society could not function. To what extent do you agree or disagree?