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Band 6

You recently went to a concert and thought one of te singers was very good. You want to tell him hoe you feel. Write a letter to the singer. In your letter - say how you feel about his performance -give details of your musical activities -explain how you would like him to help you with your musical activities

#concert #te #singers #hoe #singer #performance #-give #activities #-explain
Dear Shaan, I hope
this
 letter finds you well. I recently attended your live concert that happened in Amritsar
last
 week on 15th September. You have great vocals and your live singing was pleasing to
ears
Correct article usage
the ears
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. I feel delighted to mention that you had a good grasp of the
music
notes
 and the variations that
used
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were used
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 were so impressive. It was a captivating concert; if you had time, we would have requested
for
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apply
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more of your time. I am a dedicated singer and working as a part-time
music
 teacher with one of the
music
 centres in my city. I have been practising to improve my
notes
 and get hold of my breath
while
 singing in one note, but, I have always been failing to do that. I am interested
to register
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in registering
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 myself for
upcoming
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the upcoming
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 singing competition Indian Idol. Before
that
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that,
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 I want to understand the several aspects of
music
notes
 and practice my rags under the supervision of
experienced
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an experienced
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 person. I have recorded my
music
 and sending you
along with
this
 letter so that you can listen to it. I urge you to give your valuable feedback and ways to refine my
notes
. It would be considerate of you if you allow me to have a few practice sessions under your supervision. I look forward to hearing from you soon. Yours sincerely, JK
Submitted by jyotikhera2712 on

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task achievement
Try to elaborate a bit more on how the singer's performance influenced you. It would also be beneficial to connect your musical activities to the singer's style or techniques you admired during the concert. This can make your request for guidance more compelling.
coherence cohesion
While your letter is logically structured, consider consolidating similar ideas into a single paragraph and ensuring each point flows smoothly into the next. This can help improve the overall readability and coherence of your letter.
task achievement
The letter maintains a consistent and suitable writing tone, which is respectful and appropriate for addressing the singer.
coherence cohesion
The greeting and closing are effectively handled, contributing to a polite and well-rounded letter.
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