One of the consequences of improved medical care is that people are living longer and life expectancy is increasing. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

#consequences #care #people #life #expectancy #development

One of the results of enhanced health care is leading to the

life

span of humans longer. Numerous people claim that the benefits of

this

improvement are more than the drawbacks. In

this

essay, I will discuss how I wholeheartedly agree with

this

statement by exploring both the advantages and disadvantages of the problem mentioned. The first welfare can bring to us is a healthier population. Some older individuals who still have strength and sagacity can engage in volunteer or remain in the workforce. Thereby,

this

can result in a more developed economy.

Secondly

, it can lead us to the better criteria of

life

. Advancement in medicines does not just prolong

life

, it improves its quality, allowing people to live healthier and more fulfilling lives.

For instance

, various diseases that were deemed to be dangerous and incurable,

such

as cancers, AIDS, and so on, now can be controlled for years, thanks to modern science. Still,

this

improvement comes with drawbacks. The

growing

Replace the word

growth

show examples

of the elderly population can put some pressure on social assistance. It can increase

taxes

Fix the agreement mistake

tax

show examples

prices and more government spending.

Furthermore

this

can cause to environmental impact. More citizens living longer could

Verb problem

increase

show examples

up consumption of resources, contributing to environmental challenges. In conclusion, in my opinion,

although

the rising

life

expectancy

due to

improved medical care has some certain challenges, the advantages significantly outnumber the disadvantages. People are now able to live healthier, more productive lives, contributing to society for longer and experiencing a better quality of

life

Therefore

, the increase in

life

expectancy remains a positive development for individuals and society as a whole.

Submitted by hvyhsgs on Fri Sep 27 2024

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task achievement

Ensure that your main points are clearly supported with specific examples. For instance, when discussing the advantages and disadvantages, provide concrete data or examples to strengthen your argument.

coherence cohesion

Work on the logical structure of your paragraphs. Try to ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and flows logically to the next.

task achievement

You have effectively addressed the task and provided a comprehensive response to the prompt.

coherence cohesion

Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps to frame your argument and guide the reader.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

267 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

life expectancy
elderly population
health care systems
pension funds
extended family relationships
quality of life
aging population
economic growth
volunteer work
expertise
financial planning
retirement
age-related diseases
medical research
healthier lifestyles

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Fully explain your ideas

Many governmants think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people ,however are equally important for a country Discuss both views and give your own opininion.

It is argued that parents of children who break the law should be punished as they are responsible for their children's actions.To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Living in a country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious social problems, as well as practical problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary schools rather than secondary schools. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?