It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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Nowadays, people are willing to take
risks
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no matter in their professional or personal
lives
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. In my opinion, the advantages of taking
risks
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outweigh the disadvantages. On the one hand, people may think doing something bold or taking some challenges may do harm to their original life.
That is
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, they don't want to put themselves in some risky events or opportunities.
For example
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, my mother
had
Verb problem
was
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given a promotion opportunity in her first year of career,
which
Correct pronoun usage
she
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needed to go abroad and
operated
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operate
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a new shop.
However
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, to her, it was an unknown journey that she didn't dare to take the risk. In
this
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way, the uncertainty about whether taking
risks
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will end up leading to successful or
failure
Replace the word
failed
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lives
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will
hesitate
Verb problem
make
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people's decisions.
However
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, for me, it is better to take
the
Correct article usage
apply
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risks
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rather than satisfy your
situations
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situation
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.
First,
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though there are chances to feel frustrated or overwhelmed after taking the risk, you still can learn something from the new experience.
For instance
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, it is
easily
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easy
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to fail when going to another country and
start
Wrong verb form
starting
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a business;
nevertheless
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,
while
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you take the venture, no matter what
is
Verb problem
apply
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the outcome you still can learn new skills or knowledge,
such
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as learning a new language or making progress on your problem-solving ability. In
this
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way, taking
risks
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are
Change the verb form
is
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still worth a try.
In addition
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, always living in your comfort zone is not a good way to improve your professional and personal
lives
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.
Therefore
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, why not seize the opportunity to escape
the
Correct article usage
apply
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boring and conventional
lives
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.
Change the punctuation
?
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In conclusion, though there may be some disadvantages when taking
risks
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, it is worthwhile to give it a shot to experience new things in your
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lives
Fix the agreement mistake
life
show examples
.
Submitted by lovesonya0227 on

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coherence cohesion
Try to use transition words and phrases more effectively to create better flow between ideas. This will enhance the logical progression and coherence of your essay.
task achievement
Expand and elaborate more on your main points to provide a comprehensive response. Adding more details and examples will strengthen your argument.
task achievement
Work on refining your language and vocabulary to clearly convey comprehensive ideas. This will help make your essay more impactful.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion that frame the discussion logically.
task achievement
Relevant examples are used to support the main points, making the argument more convincing.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Opportunities
  • Growth
  • Innovation
  • Challenges
  • Self-discovery
  • Resilience
  • Uncertainty
  • Consequences
  • Calculated risks
  • Stagnation
  • Regret
  • Comfort zone
  • Entrepreneurship
  • Adventurous spirit
  • Thriving
  • Failure
  • Mitigate
  • Reap the rewards
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