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Band 2.5

Some people say that university education is the best way to achieve success in life, while others believe it is no longer true. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #university #education #success #life
Experts say studying at
university
 is very important and it helps to create your career.
However
Add a comma
However,
show examples
 some people oppose
this
 idea. Personally, everyone should work for their future. There are two
way
Fix the agreement mistake
ways
show examples
for choosing
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to choose
show examples
 you can
it
Add a missing verb
do it
show examples
.
Firstly
 if you
graduated
Wrong verb form
graduate
show examples
 from
university
, it will be easier for you to find a job. Which requires maximum effort and study from you.More and more companies will offer you a job if you are graduated. It will help you find your workplace in future. Studying at
university
 is
better
Add an article
the better
a better
show examples
 way than walking around in vain. It should
also
 be taken into account that not entering the
university
 doesn't mean that
like
Correct your spelling
life
show examples
 is over. Many entrepreneurs started their
business
Fix the agreement mistake
businesses
show examples
 at the age of 14,
15
Correct word choice
or 15
show examples
. If you want to set up your
business
 early, you have to take debt.
Finally
Add a comma
Finally,
show examples
 you will understand that some people are better
of
Change preposition
off
show examples
 getting a job after
university
 and some people are better
of
Change preposition
off
show examples
 starting their own
business
. But l prefer to study at
university
 because you will not be able to invest enough to start your own
business
 if you are not rich
Submitted by saydusmonovasomiddin94 on

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coherence cohesion
Improve your introduction and conclusion for a stronger structure by clearly stating your position and summarizing your main points.
task achievement
Ensure all your main points are well-supported with specific examples or explanations to strengthen your argument.
task achievement
The essay presents a balanced view by considering both sides of the argument regarding the importance of university education for success.
coherence cohesion
The essay attempts to structure the response by introducing the topic, discussing two perspectives, and providing a personal preference.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • achievement
  • acquisition
  • advancement
  • aspiring
  • credentials
  • credentials
  • employment
  • entrepreneurship
  • graduate
  • institutions
  • invest
  • knowledge
  • opportunities
  • pathways
  • perspective
  • networking
  • potential
  • prosperity
  • self-education
  • skills
  • success
  • tuition fees
  • university education
  • valuable
  • vocational
  • worldly knowledge
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