To solve the problem of environmental pollution we need to increase the cost of fuel. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

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There is an opinion in the society that increasing the cost of fuel can solve the environmental issues. I partly agree with

this

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idea

due to

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the fact I believe that

this

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tactic can help mitigate the impact on the environment, but there may be other ways to do

this

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. In

this

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essay, I plan to explore a few thoughts of mine about

this

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phenomenon.

Firstly

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, the most prominent factor in favour of

this

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point of view is the possible reduction of the number of vehicles fueled with gas, and,

as a result

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, the reduction of the exhaust they emit.

While

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this

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can lead to less carbon footprint, I still believe that there are more effective measures to deal with

this

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dilemma.

For example

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, improving the transportation system through the development of public transport

such

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as trains and buses can lead people to prefer these modes of commuting to private cars. Obviously, our nature will benefit from

this

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Secondly

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, the above-mentioned strategy of higher prices will plausibly cause an additional financial burden on the public.

Moreover

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, the higher the price of fuel, the higher the cost of dependent manufacturers, and,

consequently

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, the higher the cost of their products.

This

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sounds

doubtfully

Change the word

doubtful

show examples

to me.

Instead

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, governments can include subjects in the school curriculum to foster a responsible attitude towards our planet.

For instance

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, various events that will explain to children the advantages of using bikes can result in fewer cars on the streets in the future.

To conclude

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, expensive gas can partially solve the problem of pollution.

On the contrary

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, governments can maintain more productive politics

such

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as the above-mentioned ones to deal with

this

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scourge of our planet.

ruben.kirakosyanTue Apr 23 2024

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Coherence & Cohesion

You've done well in structuring your essay, which supports logical flow. Ensure every paragraph transitions smoothly into the next to enhance readability.

Coherence & Cohesion

To further improve, try incorporating a wider range of cohesive devices and vary sentence structures to avoid repetitiveness.

Task Achievement

Your essay broadly addresses the task, presenting a balanced view with some specifics. For a higher score, strengthen your argument by providing more detailed examples and a deeper analysis of each point.

Language

Incorporate a wider variety of vocabulary and complex sentence structures to articulate your ideas more precisely and make your argument more compelling.

Introduction & Conclusion

Effective introduction and conclusion, providing a clear overview and stance on the topic.

Paragraphing

Good use of paragraphs to separate ideas, making the essay easier to follow.

Main Points Presentation

Properly introduced and summarised main points, aiding the overall clarity of your argument.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

14
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

278 words

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To solve the problem of environmental pollution we need to increase the cost of fuel. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Some people think that parents should teach their children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the best place to learn this. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Art classes, such as paintng and drawing, art as important to a child's development as other subjects, so it should be compulsory in high schools. To what extent do you agree or diagree?

Some people think that healthcare should be free for everyone; other things that people should pay for their medical cost themselves discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some universities now offer their courses on the Internet so that people can study online. Is this a positive or negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

In many countries nowadays, consumers can go to a supermarket and buy food produced all over the world. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?