IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

WRITING TASK 2 You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic: Many people try to achieve success through their career or education. What can success mean to different people? What is your view of success? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience. Write at least 250 words.

#minutes #topic #people #success #career #education
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Several people nowadays think that obtaining a certification or being employed in a certain field will be the key to their
success
. Being a successful person, in my opinion, is not certain only in working or education; there are many reasons for being an effective individual in your life.
This
 essay will illustrate my point of view. Being in good health for many people is considered one of the best signs of
success
.
For instance
, many people with chronic illnesses, who are more vulnerable to passing away, have advanced professional levels despite
this
.
Additionally
, many believe they hold the entire world in their hands when they own significant financial capital.
For example
, big companies, which possess a huge sum of money, believe that with
this
 money they have the ability to buy whatever they want. My point of
success
 is completely different; despite the importance of jobs or certification, being close to God is the most essential and important
success
 in life. I strongly think that God is the source of our inner faith and motivation to follow the correct path to
success
, despite the belief held by many that learning and hard effort are necessary. In conclusion, having a good job and certificates are very important to be a successful person;
otherwise
, many things are more substantial for many inhabitants,
such
 as being in good health without illnesses
as well as
 earning a huge amount of money.
However
, the relationship between God and his slaves from my perspective should be close to guide them on the right path.
Submitted by talahakoura27 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Consider providing more specific examples to support your points. For instance, you could elaborate on how individuals you know demonstrate success through good health or financial capital.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear connection to the main topic. This will help improve the logical flow of ideas.
introduction conclusion
The essay presents a well-defined introduction and conclusion that frame the discussion effectively.
task achievement
You use personal opinion effectively, contributing to a well-articulated viewpoint on success.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: