In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?
Undoubtedly, moving from the suburbs to the main
city
is a huge step forward. While
it is a commonly held belief that rural people started to move from the suburbs to towns, there is also
an argument that the population began to decrease in the countryside via the people leaving. This
essay will analyse both points of development and express my opinion.
On the one hand, moving to the main city
has various benefits for rural humans, such
as schooling resources, hospitals, and job opportunities. For instance
, kids can join school and learn, labourers will have many job chances, and massive hospital facilities
are quite near them. However
, moving can have its challenges, along with
the line of expensive flats and apartments and the noise pollution. This
could be an issue for the migration.
On the other hand
, the rural population decline can cause multiple issues in the countryside. The suburb's facilities
that produce fruit or oil products will face a drawback due to
the rural workers moving to the main city
. Thus
, the holy work will fall. For example
, many of the companies are in the suburbs due to
the cheap land and the air quality, so if workers leave their jobs and move to town, then
it will cause an issue for the facilities
.
In conclusion, while
there is no definitive answer to this
issue, rural families will have various benefits from moving to a city
, such
as the opportunity for learning for kids, new jobs for adults, and more hospital care. However
, facilities
will have many drawbacks with this
process and will not be happy.Submitted by ferasmirza11 on
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task achievement
Try to delve deeper into each point to elaborate more comprehensively, especially when discussing the downsides of moving to cities or the advantages from an economic perspective.
coherence cohesion
While the logical structure of your essay is clear, ensure each paragraph transitions smoothly into the next. Consider using more cohesive devices to guide the reader through your arguments.
task achievement
When providing examples, try to include more specific and varied instances or statistics that reinforce your points and add credibility to your arguments.
coherence cohesion
The essay is structured well with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion which aligns well with IELTS requirements.
task achievement
You have identified both positive and negative aspects thoughtfully, thereby showing a balanced perspective.
coherence cohesion
The essay's conclusion effectively summarizes the key points discussed and clarifies your overall stance on the issue.
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