Some people think that media have the right to publish details of people's private lives, while others think it should be controlled. Discuss both views.
In
this
information
era, the media
tend to share information
as comprehensively as possible in publishing news, including a person’s
private information
. Some people believe that sharing someone’s
private information
is the media
's authorization. In contrast
, some audiences argue that private information
published should be limited. It depends on the perspective, but as an audience
, I believe that sharing a person’s
private information
should be restricted.
Some people perceive that sharing someone’s
private lives
is a right for the Fix the agreement mistake
life
media
as it potentially grabs the viewer's attention and credibility. Journalists tend to serve a complete story on
one’s life, including the untold one. Change preposition
of
For instance
, when a news anchor announces an achievement of our badminton athletes, he or she will also
share about the athlete’s background and their
life story. It shapes the Correct pronoun usage
apply
audience
's perception that this
source of announcement puts comprehensive information
that is
related to the achievement. From the viewer’s point of view, a
Correct article usage
the
media
is more credible when they serve the news as thoroughly as possible.
On the other hand
, others believe that sharing a person’s
private information
should be strictly controlled since it potentially disturbed
one’s privacy. Wrong verb form
disturbs
Information
that the audience
receives about someone’s
private lives
can trigger them to act aggressively, especially those who are obsessed with the person. Through the details about Fix the agreement mistake
life
someone’s
address, they can potentially do something disturbing such
as stalking or throwing a threat through a mail or gift. Those kinds of acts interrupt the person’s
privacy, and it is categorized as a crime.
To conclude
, some people believe that publishing someone’s
private life is a
Correct article usage
the
media
’s right to catch viewer’s attention and elevate their credibility. Meanwhile, others believe that the media
should be controlled on
sharing a Change preposition
in
person’s
private information
since it can trigger an audience
to interfere with the person. In my perspective, the media
should strictly choose the information
about someone’s
personal information
to preserve the person’s
privacy.Submitted by astarindri on
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence that directly relates to the main question. This will strengthen the logical flow of your essay.
task achievement
Give more specific and varied examples to strengthen your argument and make it more persuasive.
task achievement
Consider addressing counterarguments more explicitly to provide a balanced view.
introduction conclusion present
The essay opens with a clear introduction that sets the stage for the discussion, and the conclusion nicely wraps up the arguments.
complete response
The essay addresses both views of the debate thoroughly and offers a clear personal opinion.
logical structure
There is a logical flow to the ideas, and the use of linking words like 'for instance' supports coherence throughout the essay.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?