Fewer young people play sports these days. Why is this? What can be done to encourage more young people to do sports?

#people #sports

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There is no doubt that participating in various sports can maintain individual fitness.

However

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, nowadays, there is a noticeable decrease in people exercising their bodies. In

this

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essay, I will delve into the cause of

this

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trend and

then

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discuss potential solutions.

This

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phenomenon happens because people are living in a fast-paced work setting.

For instance

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, a startup employee can spend time in their office around ten to fourteen hours.

Moreover

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, current jobs are not physically demanding. A good case in point is software engineers who only require computers to work on their projects.

At the end

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of the day, these

employees

Use synonyms

are not having enough time to do exercise especially when the distance to the gym is quite far. Examining the idea of encouraging people through public facilities,

this

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idea relies on offering efficiency to the

employees

Use synonyms

. The government or private companies can construct in-office fitness venues,

consequently

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employees

Use synonyms

can shorten their travel time to the gym by utilizing these facilities.

Moreover

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, institutions can benefit from

this

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initiative because it increases productivity by lowering the number of sick leave conducted by

employees

Use synonyms

Additionally

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, these facilities can be integrated with health-related advertisements.

This

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type of public campaign can be utilized to convey messages related to both financial and health risks associated with unhealthy lifestyles.

For example

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, crafting a campaign that emphasizes the high cost of health treatments. At its core, the government or private entities are the ones that are most responsible for executing these initiatives and

also

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benefit the most from them.

Submitted by manapapuja2 on Wed Oct 30 2024

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task achievement

It would enhance the essay to provide additional examples of young people being influenced by fast-paced lifestyles, not just specific to employees but students as well.

task achievement

Make sure to clearly distinguish between solutions targeted at young employees versus solutions targeted at students or non-working youth for a more comprehensive response.

coherence cohesion

Ensure each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next to improve flow and connection between ideas.

coherence cohesion

Conclusion needs to be more than a summary. Consider suggesting what might happen if these solutions are implemented or not implemented.

task achievement

The essay clearly outlines the current problem of reduced sports participation among the youth and provides logical reasoning related to modern work culture.

task achievement

Includes plausible solutions with realistic applications like in-office fitness venues and health campaigns.

coherence cohesion

The essay has a clear introduction and discusses the issue and solutions in distinct paragraphs.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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10
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

253 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

sedentary
engagement
incentives
obesity
recreation
well-being
peer pressure
physical fitness
endurance
balance
teamwork
coordination
confidence
self-esteem
discipline
facilities
accessible
affordable
curriculum
extracurricular
inclusion

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Fewer young people play sports these days. Why is this? What can be done to encourage more young people to do sports?

Include an introduction and conclusion

In some countries, the difference in age between parents and children nowadays is greater than in the past. Is this a positive or negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience. Write at least 250 words.

It is said that people’s life now is becoming more and more stressful. What are the causes and how to solve it?

Plastic bags, plastic bottles and plastic packaging are bad for the environment. What damage does plastic do to the environment? What can be done by governments and individuals to solve this problem?

What is your opinion about the advantages of smoking cigarettess?

In many parts of the world girls and boys are educated together in co- education or mixed schools. Some people think that girls and boys benefit from being educated separately in single-sex schools. To what extent do you agree with this view ?