Air travel can only benefit the richest people in the world. The ordinary people can get no advantage with the development of air travel. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people argue that air travel can only have positive effects on the richest individuals in the world,
however
, ordinary residents do not have a chance to get the benefits of air travel. In my opinion, I disagree with
this
view, I will list the following reasons to support my thought. First of all,
due to
the development of technology and the Internet, it is convenient to buy aeroplane
tickets
for everyone.
For example
, individuals who want to buy airplane
tickets
; only need a smartphone or a laptop with internet and move their fingers
instead
of waiting in a long line at the airport in the past.
Secondly
, there are a lot of
tickets
at discounts especially in the off-season, which can increase many opportunities to take
airplane
Fix the agreement mistake
airplanes
show examples
for ordinary visitors.
For instance
, some residents have a travel plan once or twice a year, they can order flight
tickets
in advance because the price of
tickets
would be cheaper than buying closer.
Furthermore
, air companies set different cabinets on the plane. Some are business class,
while
others are economy class. People can choose the class that they need, it depends on their financial ability.
However
, it is undeniable that the price of airline
tickets
is usually higher than other public transport,
such
as buses, subways, and trains. It is because the airlines need more costs to afford it. In conclusion, there is some advice for ordinary residents who want to take an aeroplane,
that is
choose a way how to reduce their spending on airfares.
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Coherence and Cohesion
To achieve a higher score, refine the logical flow of ideas with clearer connections between points. While the essay has a solid structure, ensure each paragraph naturally leads to the next.
Task Achievement
Although you presented relevant examples, consider adding more depth or additional examples to substantiate your arguments. This would enhance your critical thinking demonstration.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay provides a clear introduction and conclusion, effectively framing the argument.
Task Achievement
Good use of examples to support the points made, such as mentioning technology and varying ticket prices.

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • accessible
  • democratised
  • low-cost carriers
  • budget airlines
  • globalization
  • international trade
  • luxury experiences
  • affordable flights
  • cultural exchange
  • environmental impact
  • eco-friendly
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