Some people say that computer skills should be added to primary subjects in elementary school such as reading, writing and math. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#people #computer #skills #subjects #school #math

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

It is

common

Change the adjective

commonly

show examples

accepted that digital has become

the

Correct article usage

show examples

major part of nowadays. With

this

Linking Words

regard, it is argued that

computer

Use synonyms

skills

Use synonyms

should be added to subjects

such

Linking Words

as primary subjects. It is like reading, math and writing.

While

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

may be

Change preposition

apply

show examples

a natural decision,

but

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

I disagree with

this

Linking Words

proposition for two reasons.

Firstly

Linking Words

children

Use synonyms

tend to acquire

computer

Use synonyms

skills

Use synonyms

outside

classroom

Add an article

the classroom

show examples

. Because

children

Use synonyms

spend a lot of time with technology outside of

school

Use synonyms

, they usually master

computer

Use synonyms

skills

Use synonyms

successfully on their own6 without any taught

Change preposition

show examples

teachers or adults. For entrance,

Remove the article

apply

show examples

plenty of

children

Use synonyms

start using computers or tablets for entertainment

since

Change preposition

show examples

early

Add an article

an early

show examples

age, as

this

Linking Words

technology is widely available today. A typical child can use

Use synonyms

computer

Add an article

a computer

the computer

show examples

, turn

Correct pronoun usage

it on

show examples

and turn

Correct pronoun usage

it of

show examples

Change preposition

off

show examples

Linking Words

this

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

and starting from the age

Change preposition

of 5

show examples

or 6. Nowadays

children

Use synonyms

learning

Wrong verb form

learn

show examples

Remove the article

apply

show examples

plenty of sites and apps without

parents

Correct pronoun usage

their parents

show examples

, because they learn

this

Linking Words

faster

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

than adults.

Secondly

Linking Words

, schools may hardly

taught

Change the verb form

teach

be taught

show examples

any advanced

computerizations

Fix the agreement mistake

computerization

show examples

which

children

Use synonyms

do not already know. Pupils without any prior training start more and more use spread of social media

such

Linking Words

tiktok

Correct your spelling

TikTok

, Instagram,

Correct word choice

and youtube

show examples

youtube

Correct your spelling

YouTube

show examples

. They can produce their own

contetnt

Correct your spelling

content

in the form of videos and pictures on their laptops and smartphones and post

Correct pronoun usage

them

show examples

online. What is more, no one

school

Use synonyms

could not

teaching

Change the verb form

teach

be teaching

show examples

them

for

Change preposition

apply

show examples

advanced creative

contents

Fix the agreement mistake

content

show examples

with video-hosting, professional videos and photos. Social media

proving

Wrong verb form

proves

show examples

that fact the number of young content creators has been on the rise recently. To draw the conclusion,

although

Linking Words

computer

Use synonyms

education included in primary

school

Use synonyms

probably

appear

Correct subject-verb agreement

appears

show examples

to be the call of the technology age,

children

Use synonyms

learn

computer

Use synonyms

skills

Use synonyms

outside of

school

Use synonyms

and can learn at home.

Actually

Add a comma

Actually,

show examples

this

Linking Words

show

Change the verb form

shows

show examples

excellent results. Doubtless,

that

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

introducing

computer

Use synonyms

literacy classes would be

waste

Correct article usage

a waste

show examples

of time in

school

Use synonyms

education.

Submitted by moon2014angel on Sat Jan 25 2025

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion

Try to make your argument structure more clear, with smoother transitions between points.

coherence cohesion

Avoid repetition, such as stating the same idea in slightly different ways multiple times.

task achievement

Clarify and expand on your main reasons with more detailed examples.

task achievement

Ensure that each paragraph adequately supports the argument you are making.

coherence cohesion

You have included both an introduction and a conclusion, which frames your essay well.

task achievement

You have provided distinct points to support your argument against including computer skills as primary subjects.

coherence cohesion

The conclusion effectively summarizes your main argument and restates your position clearly.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
35
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

297 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

digital literacy
proficient
curriculum integration
critical thinking
problem-solving skills
digital citizenship
foundational subjects
cognitive development
responsible technology use
educational software
interactive learning
future education and career
technical knowledge

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

<4
band
In many cities, planners tend to arrange shops, schools, offices and homes in specific areas and separate them from each other. Do you think the advantages of this policyoutweigh the disadvantages?
Currently, after the development of technology more and more people especially young generation spend their time on gadgets. Some people think that watching TV can lead positive effect on children. In my opinion, the affect after use television are more harmful on young minds.
7
band
The increasing availability of low-cost airlines now lets people travel around the world. Some feel this is a positive development while others think it is negative overall. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.
The rise of low-cost airlines has made it possible for the public at large to travel abroad with relative ease. In my opinion, despite the advantages this creates for less affluent citizens, it is a net negative given the repercussions of the tourist industry to local nations.
6
band
Nowadays, not enough students choose science subjects in university in many countries. What are the reasons for this problem? What are the effects on society?
In today's world, where technology and innovation have become the driving force behind economic growth, it is concerning to see a decline in the number of students opting for science subjects in universities. This trend is observable in many countries around the globe, and it raises a pertinent question as to why there is a lack of interest in science among students. This essay will examine the underlying reasons for this problem and its impact on society.
7
band
Many people go through life doing work that they hate or have no talent for. Why does this happen? What are the consequences of this situation?
In contemporary society, many individuals often find themselves stuck in occupations they dislike or lack aptitude for due to various underlying reasons. This occurrence primarily stems from societal pressures, economic constraints, and a lack of career guidance. In this essay, I will deal with the reasons for this and outline the consequences of it.
5
band
An increasing number of larger shopping areas, malls and department stores are leading to the decline of smaller corner shops. what are the advantages and disadvantages of shopping in larger shopping centers rather than smaller, more traditional shops?
In the present world, In the big cities, many enormous shopping malls have been constructed. The rise of those shopping areas like malls and department stores means the dying of the smaller local shops especially in the capital cities. Discussing the positives and negatives of shopping in larger malls rather than the smaller corner shops will be described in the following paragraphs.

Some people say that computer skills should be added to primary subjects in elementary school such as reading, writing and math. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Fully explain your ideas

In many cities, planners tend to arrange shops, schools, offices and homes in specific areas and separate them from each other. Do you think the advantages of this policyoutweigh the disadvantages?

The increasing availability of low-cost airlines now lets people travel around the world. Some feel this is a positive development while others think it is negative overall. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

Nowadays, not enough students choose science subjects in university in many countries. What are the reasons for this problem? What are the effects on society?

Many people go through life doing work that they hate or have no talent for. Why does this happen? What are the consequences of this situation?

An increasing number of larger shopping areas, malls and department stores are leading to the decline of smaller corner shops. what are the advantages and disadvantages of shopping in larger shopping centers rather than smaller, more traditional shops?