Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

It is discussed that sharing
data
related to various subjects
such
as science, business, and academics to what extent you want is pleasant,
while
others claim that some
data
is very significant or of high value to be shared freely.
According to
the following reasons, I would reckon that I am an advocate of the latter group. These days, it seems that sharing
information
is becoming popular, especially among youngsters. Some believe that sharing
information
might be a good idea specifically in scientific research, business and academia as not only can it provide an opportunity for individuals to be able to utilize others` experiences, but
also
they can be motivated to do similar
researches
Fix the agreement mistake
research
show examples
, contributing to fostering individuals` intelligence.
Furthermore
, people can broaden their horizons by studying
this
shared
data
, leading to an enhancement of knowledgeable people.
However
, the next scenario which should be taken into consideration, as opponents including me believe, is that some
data
should be avoided from being shared freely for some reasons. Chief among these reasons is that some
data
should be relevant
due to
being highly valuable. Some
information
is regarded as a secret, take
Coca-Cola
Correct article usage
the Coca-Cola
show examples
formula as a salient example of
this
, if it is shared, all the beans will be spilt;
as a result
, its reputation will be diminished. Another key point is that when sharing, one should be certain of its registry,
otherwise
it will be at risk of plagiarism. By way of conclusion, once again I restate my position in
favor
Change the spelling
favour
show examples
of sharing
information
. Despite the arguments of the former group associated with
this
topic, I personally believe that people should not turn a blind eye
into
Change preposition
to
show examples
the fact that some specific
data
should not be shared freely because of their importance and nobility.
Submitted by ieltsacademic77 on

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coherence cohesion
Make sure to clearly distinguish between the two points of view being discussed. While your structure is logical, refining the distinction could strengthen your essay.
task achievement
Consider providing more detailed examples, particularly in support of your opinion, to reinforce task achievement.
task achievement
Your argument could be more comprehensive by expanding on how shared knowledge can specifically impact different fields like business, academia, and research.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are clear and help to establish and wrap up your essay's argument effectively.
task achievement
The essay presents a balanced view of the topic, acknowledging both sides of the argument before stating your opinion.
coherence cohesion
Some complex sentences enhance the essay, showcasing a good command of English.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • information sharing
  • scientific research
  • business
  • academic world
  • advancement of knowledge
  • progress
  • collaboration
  • cross-disciplinary research
  • open access
  • democratization of information
  • transparency
  • credibility
  • intellectual property
  • security concerns
  • commercial interests
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