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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Some people say that modern technology has made shopping today easier, while others believe it does not help shoppers much. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #technology #shoppers
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Evolution
technology
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 has been believed to facilitate going shopping nowadays
however
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 others believe it does not support
shoppers
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 much. In
this
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 essay, I shall discuss both sides in more detail before giving my opinion. On the one hand, it is easier to go shopping today thanks to modern
technology
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 which creates the convenience of online shopping. First of all, people can purchase items from the comfort of their own homes or workplaces with their smartphones or computers through the Internet.
Secondly
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, online shopping helps buyers save time because they do not have to stand in a queue at the cash counter to pay for the products that they have purchased.
Finally
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, online shopping helps
customers
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 save money when retailers can sell the products with attractive discounts because of the elimination of maintenance and real-estate costs.
On the other hand
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, some think that technological evolution does not support
shoppers
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 much but in fact, is the opposite, it has helped
shoppers
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 in all aspects of the selling process. Particularly, they can receive online payment, track delivery through applications or websites on their smartphones or computers, communicate with their
customers
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 and advertise their products through social media and websites. We can see that the convenience of online shopping has encouraged people to purchase goods that increase
shoppers
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' revenue
as well as
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 profit.
Moreover
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, through the Internet, modern
technology
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 can help
shoppers
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 connect with their
customers
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 more easily, faster, and cheaper because they do not have to pay for expensive outdoor advertising, and their online shops can consist of thousands of online
customers
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 and at the same time without physical shops. In conclusion, I agree that modern
technology
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 has made shopping today easier because of its convenience
such
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 as shopping from home, saving money, and saving time.
By contrast
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, I disagree with the statement that modern
technology
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 does not help
shoppers
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 much because the fact has proven that evolution
technology
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 supports
shoppers
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 in all aspects of the selling process.
Submitted by writingeilts on

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While your essay presents a balanced view, more specific examples and evidence could further strengthen your argument.
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Try to enhance logical transitions between ideas to improve flow and readability.
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Your essay introduces and concludes the topic clearly, setting a solid structure within the discussion.
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You present a well-rounded view by discussing both sides and providing a clear opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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