In the future, people may no longer be able to pay for things in shops using cash. All payments may have to be made by card or using phones. Do you think this will happen one day? Why do you think some people might not be happy to give up using cash?

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Cash
will no longer be available as a payment method in the near future
while
shopping.
People
have to pay using their Visa ,Mastercard or mobile. In my opinion,
society
will be cashless soon and hacking is the main reason for
people
may not be happy to leave their
cash
use
. For rapid technological advancement, very soon most of the
society
will be a cashless
society
.
People
will no longer carry
cash
or
use
cash
in their daily life expenses.
As a result
,
people
will be dependent on
cards
and phone payments.
For example
, nowadays in Canada, almost 90% of shops, restaurants, businesses and other payments are made by
cards
. Visa and Master
Cards
are very popular in
this
country and the government is trying to remove
cash
from
society
for their own purpose.
Although
there are a lot of benefits to using
cards
and phones as a payment method, a few
people
will not be happy with
this
change. Most of the old
people
in third-world countries like Bangladesh do not believe in
this
technology because of hacking. As Bangladesh is not that advanced in technology so often
people
lose their money by hacking.
For example
, in 2015, the Bangladesh central bank got hacked, and
as a result
, they lost more than 700 million dollars. Which is why a few
people
do not trust
this
system. In conclusion,
although
a lot of
people
might be unhappy when
cash
is no longer available to
use
, I think
this
change will come soon.
As a result
,
people
will not be able to
use
their
cash
in shopping and purchasing. As an alternative, they have to
use
their credit or debit
cards
or phones.
Submitted by haidher301 on

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coherence cohesion
Consider organizing your essay with clear paragraphs, each focusing on a specific aspect of the topic. This will improve logical flow.
task achievement
Provide more detailed explanations or discussions to enhance the clarity of your ideas.
task achievement
While your examples are relevant, consider including more varied examples to support your points.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion.
task achievement
You provide a real-life example of how a bank was hacked in Bangladesh, which strengthens your argument about the distrust of cashless systems.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • digital payments
  • convenient
  • efficiency
  • reduce crime
  • tangibility
  • privacy
  • limited access to technology
  • job losses
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