Some people think that children are having too much free time and this time should be used to study more. To what extent do you agree with this statement

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There are people who believe that children should not spend a greater portion of their time freely,

instead

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, they should allot most of it to studying. I fairly agree with

this

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view. Studying is an important aspect of every child's life because , in

this

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way, they will acquire more knowledge academically and be able to give full attention to their studies.

Moreover

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, if they allocate most of their free time to reading and answering each homework, it improves their understanding and comprehension skills and become responsible people.

For instance

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instead

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of playing around with other kids, some of them choose to review and study in advance. So,

this

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will help them cope with the lessons quickly and effectively.

However

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, relaxing is

also

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an essential part of learning. Everyone, even adult students needs rest, period to unwind and recharge their body and mind from all the information from school.

For instance

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, these days, it is common for students to suffer mental issues

due to

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uneasiness because of loads of activities and requirements needed to submit before the due date in the end, all they do is worry and forget the importance of relaxation. Doing recreational activities

such

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as sports, talking and playing with friends are great aids for them.

Additionally

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this

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is considered a reward for the child's brain, to give time and focus on their mental health. Eventually,

this

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will ease their mind from all the stresses they encounter relating to education. In conclusion, I partially believe that every child should only just study all day because , for me, it is

also

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important to focus on their mental and social health. In

this

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way, they will not only learn about academic subjects but

also

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how to deal with others and themselves.

cng123Mon Nov 11 2024

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coherence cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and follows a logical flow. This will strengthen your arguments and make them easier to follow.

task achievement

Try to provide more specific examples to support your points. This adds depth to your arguments and illustrates your understanding of the topic.

task achievement

Clarify and expand on some of your ideas to make them more comprehensive. This can help make your overall argument more convincing.

coherence cohesion

The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which provides a good structure.

task achievement

You've addressed both sides of the argument, giving a balanced view. This meets the task achievement criterion well.

task achievement

The essay touches on important aspects of children's education and mental health. These are relevant and add value to your arguments.

9
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

293 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

detrimental effects
mental well-being
life skills
communication
teamwork
empathy
physical development
sedentary lifestyle
unstructured play
cognitive development
academic performance
fatigue
motivation
quality over quantity
work-life balance
time management
well-rounded personality

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Some people think that children are having too much free time and this time should be used to study more. To what extent do you agree with this statement

Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business, and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

One of the consequences of improved medical care is that people are living longer and life expectancy is increasing Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

Many people are choosing to live on their own. Is this a positive or a negative trend?What is your opinion and share your personal experiences? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Nowadays many teenagers choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organization. Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case ? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development ?