The table below gives information about the marriages in Australia between 1960 and 2000.

The table below gives information about the marriages in Australia between 1960 and 2000.
The table illustrates the number of religious and civil
marriages
in Australia in the years 1960 and 2000,
as well as
the average
age
of brides and grooms.
Overall
,
while
religious
marriages
experienced a significant drop over the period, civil
marriages
showed a quick growth.
Menawhile
Correct your spelling
Meanwhile
, the average
age
which both men and women
were
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
steadily increased. The two types of
marriages
exhibited differing patterns of change. In 1960, religious
marriages
stood at 12,000 which was higher than civil ones to a mere 8,000. Both types of
marriages
grew to 46.000 and 11.000, respectively in 1970,
continued
Correct word choice
and continued
show examples
to show a moderate increase after a decade. Meanwhile,
while
the number of religious
marriages
fell to 2,000, civil
marriages
went up to 28,000. In 2000, civil ones increased sharply and religious
marriages
witnessed a growth to 36,000.
Similarly
, regarding the
age
of
marriages
, in 1960 the average
age
of brides and grooms was 21 and 23, respectively.
Thereafter
, both
age
groups went up by 2 years until 1980.
However
Add a comma
However,
show examples
after a 10-year period,
while
fthe
Correct your spelling
the
average
age
of females grew to 28 and continued to double by 2 years until 2000, the marriage
age
of males
also
showed growth to 29. In 2000, men's average
age
increased consistently by a year, finishing at 31.
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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
Vocabulary: Replace the words marriages, age with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "showed" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "went up" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "growth" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 4 times.

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