IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 1

Some people believe that companies should manufacture products that last for a long time. Others feel that the emphasis should be placed on producing goods that are cheap. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #companies #products #time #emphasis #goods
Kids are often given a message which can reach anything if they try hard enough in some culture. There are merits and demerits
for
Change preposition
to
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 it which are elaborated in the following essay. On the positive side, when children are told that can achieve their goals if try enough,
then
 they try it more and more and they do not give up easily.
Submitted by mkhdermani on

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task achievement
Expand on both viewpoints in the introduction, explaining the merits and demerits of telling children they can achieve anything if they try hard enough.
task achievement
Include specific examples or experiences to substantiate claims. It helps in illustrating and reinforcing the arguments presented.
coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence followed by supporting details and examples.
coherence cohesion
Develop a clear conclusion that summarizes the main points and provides your personal perspective based on the discussion presented.
task achievement
The essay identifies a common message told to children in some cultures, recognizing both potential advantages and disadvantages of this message.
task achievement
The discussion shows an understanding of the importance of perseverance in achieving personal goals.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • sustainability
  • disposable goods
  • economic benefits
  • frequent replacements
  • technological adaptation
  • manufacturing affordability
  • environmental responsibility
  • longevity
  • minimize costs
  • wider society
What to do next:
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