Young people are often influenced in their behaviors and situations by others in the same age. This is called “peer pressure”. Do the disadvantages outweigh the advantages?
Peer
pressure
is a pervasive phenomenon that significantly shapes the behaviours of young individuals. While
some assert that it plays a crucial role in positively influencing the youth, others contend that its drawbacks can be profoundly damaging.
When channelled appropriately, peer
pressure
can yield several benefits. For one, it fosters a sense of belonging and camaraderie among individuals of the same age group. Young people often seek validation and support from their peers, which can enhance their emotional well-being and boost self-confidence. Additionally
, positive peer
influence may encourage healthy habits, such
as regular exercise or abstaining from harmful activities. For instance
, a teenager might decide to quit smoking when surrounded by friends who advocate for a smoke-free lifestyle.
Conversely
, the negative aspects of peer
pressure
cannot be overlooked. A significant concern lies in its potential to steer impressionable minds towards detrimental behaviours. Many youths may capitulate to peer
influences, engaging in harmful actions like substance abuse, petty crimes, or dangerous activities such
as speeding without a seatbelt. These behaviours often have far-reaching consequences, jeopardising both their safety and future prospects.
Furthermore
, excessive peer
influence may suppress individuality and curtail creativity, as young individuals may feel compelled to conform to group norms rather than pursue their unique aspirations and dreams. This
tendency to conform can impede personal development and stifle independent thought, which are
crucial for holistic growth.
Change the verb form
is
To conclude
, while
peer
pressure
does present certain advantages, such
as fostering camaraderie and encouraging positive habits, I maintain that its disadvantages outweigh these benefits. The potential for harm, coupled with
its tendency to suppress individuality, makes it imperative for parents, educators, and society to help young people navigate peer
influence wisely and make well-informed decisions.Submitted by hibana2077 on
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task achievement
The essay could expand more on specific examples related to both positive and negative aspects of peer pressure to strengthen the argument.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next, reinforcing the coherence of the argument.
introduction conclusion present
The essay presents a strong, well-structured introduction and conclusion that neatly capture the essence of the discussion.
logical structure
There is a clear logical progression of ideas, with each point reinforcing the stance that the disadvantages of peer pressure outweigh the advantages.
supported main points
Main points are well-supported by explanations and are thoroughly developed.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.