many children these days have an unhealthy lifestyle.both schools and parents are responsible for solving this problem. two what extend do you agree or disagree?

#children #lifestyle #schools #parents #two

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this

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period of globalization. Many children are

administering

Verb problem

having

show examples

detrimental habits.In my opinion, schools and their parents have to organize

about preventing

Change preposition

to prevent

show examples

this

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negative approach. I strongly agree with

this

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notion and my opinion

wil

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will

dicussed

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discussed

further

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paragraphs with a suitable conclusion. supporting my agreement to the given statement ,

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show examples

frimly

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firmly

believe that children do not have enough awareness about their

life style

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lifestyle

show examples

since they

could not

Wrong verb form

cannot

show examples

recognize the correct

way

Use synonyms

Correct your spelling

show examples

the incorrect

way

Use synonyms

Moreover

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minds of kids

designed

Add a missing verb

are designed

show examples

such

Linking Words

Use synonyms

way

Fix the agreement mistake

ways

show examples

for investigating

Change preposition

to investigate

show examples

novel things and

aquiring

Correct your spelling

acquire

various

experience

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experiences

show examples

regardless of the consequence of that incident.

For instance

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along with

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popularization

Correct article usage

the popularization

show examples

technology

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of technology

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, the

life style

Correct your spelling

lifestyle

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of younger

peoples

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people

show examples

have

Correct subject-verb agreement

has

show examples

changed

which

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

the primary reason for

this

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is related to computer

playes

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games

therefore

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their brains require exploration

exciting

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of exciting

show examples

things that

there

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their

show examples

plays appear a charming space for them but

this

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way

Use synonyms

make

unconsious

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unconscious

impression on childrens brain.ultimately they do not aware of

Correct article usage

the detrimentals

show examples

detrimentals

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detrimental

effects but the

induvidual

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individuals

espechially educatinal

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especially educational

systems have lots of information and experience about

diffrent

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different

aspects so they should make an

efort

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effort

to control

this

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trend.

Explainning

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Explaining

some of

the

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apply

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another

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other

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supporting

poinsts

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points

in against

this

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statemens

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statement

statements

.It is true that psychologists claim that their families have to generate

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great

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a gerat

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gerat

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great

atmosphere for trying

varius

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various

thing

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things

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even

ensuitable

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unsuitable

suitable

performanc

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performance

with deplorable effects

tahtone

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that one

of them is generation to

inextrovert

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extrovert

in extrovert

introvert

personality without possessing health

comunication

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communication

but they have to

acccepst

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the results of their choices until learning the coordination ways for developing the positive lifestyle In conclusion,

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show examples

perceive

taht

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that

children require the

regulaion

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regulation

regulations

of their parents and educational systems

that

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so that

show examples

they can adopt

best

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the best

show examples

way

Use synonyms

of success in their

lifes

Correct your spelling

lives

show examples

. I believe that

aforementioned

Correct article usage

the aforementioned

show examples

points are strongly supporting my

view point

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viewpoint

show examples

Submitted by melicanamdari on Thu Nov 28 2024

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task response

Your essay presents a clear opinion and attempts to address the task, but more attention is needed on developing your ideas to make your argument more compelling.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that your ideas are fully explained and connected logically. Try to improve the internal coherence of your paragraphs for a better flow.

task response

Some of your ideas are a bit unclear. Make sure to use simple and concise language to convey your thoughts more effectively.

coherence cohesion

Your essay features an introduction and conclusion, both of which are effectively articulated to reflect your stance on the issue.

task achievement

You have attempted to support your opinion by citing the influence of technology and family environment, which is relevant to the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
54
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

283 words

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many children these days have an unhealthy lifestyle.both schools and parents are responsible for solving this problem. two what extend do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Many manufactered food and drink products contain high level of sugar, which causes many health problems. SUgar products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

some people said professionals such as doctors or engineers should be required to work in the country where they did their training while other said they should be free to work in another country ? Descuss both view and tell you own idea

The barchart below shows the total number of minutes (in billions) of telephone calls in Australia, divided into three categories, from 2001- 2008. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant

Convenience foods will become increasingly prevalent and eventually replace traditional foods and tradition methods of food preparation. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

The internet has greatly increased our access to information. To what extent do you think this is a good thing? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.