In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. why might this be the case. Do you think this a positive or negative situation

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Some residents of countries assume that being a homeowner is better, than renting one. In recent years, the debate over whether owning a

home

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is better, than renting or if

this

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does not play a significant role.

While

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some claim that

this

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allows a family to not be worried about the place, where they can live, I strongly agree with

this

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statement, as I believe that

this

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provides family harmony and self-independence.

This

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essay will elucidate both the benefits and my personal opinion.

To begin

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with, being a

house

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owner has various benefits. Primary, it plays a vital role in creating a family.

For example

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, Kazakh people have a tradition, which allows the youngest son should live with his parents and the mother of the son can argue with his son's wife, which leads to ruining harmony in the family.

This

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tradition increases the rate of divorces in Kazakhstan, which means that every fourth family gets a divorce in the first year after a marriage.

Additionally

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, owning a

home

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is a crucial investment for the future.

For instance

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, owners of their apartments always have a place, where they can go, which helps for leisure.

However

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, renting a

house

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is not something bad.

Firstly

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, it is the best decision for those persons, who want to move out from their parents

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apply

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but can not buy an apartment.

For example

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this

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is a good step to life as an adult with personal improvement. Renting is not something bad.

Moreover

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, 70 per cent of Petropavlsks' residents rent or lease a

house

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Secondly

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, renting a

home

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requires less responsibility.

For instance

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, the

home

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's owner should renovate a

house

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, and pay bills, but tenants need not do it, the apartments have furniture and the only thing that people should do is move in. In conclusion,

although

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I concur that renting a

house

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has more benefits for first experience or living alone, I strongly believe that owning a

home

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is the best choice , especially for families.

pandatvin3Sun Dec 01 2024

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coherence cohesion

Consider organizing your ideas more clearly and logically. Ensure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and that ideas progress in a coherent sequence.

task achievement

Improve the clarity of your arguments by clearly stating your position early in the essay and ensuring that each argument directly supports it.

coherence cohesion

The essay has both an introduction and a conclusion, summarizing the key points and providing closure.

task achievement

Specific examples are provided, such as the Kazakh tradition, to support the points made, adding depth to the argument.

11
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

330 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

ownership
renting
importance
sense of security
stability
financial investment
asset
customize
decorate
belonging
community
potential
future generations
long-term
cost advantage
control
living space

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Some people think that increasing the cost of fuel is one of the best ways to solve environmental problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion？