In some countries good school and medical facilities are available in city only. Some people think that teachers and good hospital, education should be provided in rural areas for few years. While some people think that every person is free to do work according to their choice. Discuss your ideas and opinios. Discuss both the sides.
#countries #school #facilities #city #people #teachers #education #areas #years #person #work #choice #opinios
considerable school and medical
eminitie
just can find in Correct your spelling
amenities
urban
area in some Add an article
an urban
the urban
areas
in the world. i
do believe that Change the capitalization
I
while
some people
think that it is better to move some tutors or nursing facilities
to rural areas
it must be optional with some advantages for who
Correct pronoun usage
those who
wants
to Correct subject-verb agreement
want
work
in a different area.
in my opinion, there are some benefits to transferring a number of facilities
to rural areas
. firstly
, a lot of students have to immigrate to bigger cities for higher education. It leads to overpopulation
of megacities that contribute to a dozen problems like air pollution and traffic congestion. Correct article usage
the overpopulation
secondly
, people
who live outside of a considerable city have the right to have a high level of medical facilities
for their mental and physical well-being. on the other hand
, a hospital with good applicants is necessary for individuals who live in rural areas
, especially in emergency situations such
as accidents.
it is true that people
can choose their workplace independently, but allocating facilities
between various areas
needs to be organized. first and foremost, government
can set some rules and regulations for teachers or medical specialists to Add an article
the government
work
in some rural areas
with circule
period as Correct your spelling
circle
circular
temporary
situation. In Add an article
a temporary
this
kind of condition, MDs, nurses, and tutors can assist people
in small cities but not as permanent. following that, volentry
communities and city Correct your spelling
voluntary
counciler
can provide some privileges and more salaries to foster specialists to go Correct your spelling
councillor
councils
council
local
schools or hospitals. it helps to immigrate Change preposition
to local
people
who work
in the educational or medical system to rural areas
from urban areas
like voluntary work
for smaller ones in the country.
in conclusion, working in an urban area should be optional with benefits which can help people
in rural areas
as well as
people
in urban areas
.Submitted by zahrahaghgou95 on
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task achievement
When discussing both sides of an argument, ensure that each side is given equal and balanced attention. In the essay, the argument against providing facilities in rural areas is not well developed. Expanding on the point that people have the right to choose their workplaces would add depth to the essay.
coherence cohesion
Use linking words and phrases such as 'furthermore,' 'in addition,' or 'conversely' to improve the flow between ideas and paragraphs.
task achievement
Provide more relevant and specific examples to strengthen your points. For instance, mentioning specific government initiatives in countries where a similar approach has been successful could add weight to your argument.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are clearly present, framing the essay well.
task achievement
The essay presents some valid points, such as the overpopulation of cities and the need for emergency services in rural areas.
task achievement
The writer offers practical solutions, such as temporary assignments and incentives for professionals moving to rural areas.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.