Schools are no longer necessary because children can get so much information available through the Internet and they can study just as well at home. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#schools #children #information #internet #study #home

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Nowadays, with the evolution of technology and the appearance of platforms that give information to kids, it is argued that there is no longer a need for

schools

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, and children can learn in their houses. In my opinion, I completely disagree with

this

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idea

due to

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the importance and influence of

schools

Use synonyms

Moreover

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, I think there is nothing that can compensate for the role of

schools

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Firstly

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, going to

school

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is necessary, especially for young age groups, because the role of

school

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and home integrates with each other. Guardians teach their children the main values,

such

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as honesty, loyalty, and helping others,

while

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schools

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look after them and strengthen these good values.

Schools

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teach children how to be self-independent, disciplined, and improve

students

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' personalities and correct their bad behaviors.

For example

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, some

schools

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around the world tend to hire a psychologist in order to deal with struggles, face

students

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, or talk with violent

students

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in a kind way in order to alleviate bad behaviour

instead

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of punishment.

Secondly

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, attending

physically

Change the word

physical

show examples

Change preposition

apply

show examples

school

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will accelerate their educational achievement. Teachers explain subjects to them better than online lessons, so

this

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will diminish the chances of misunderstanding.

Although

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learning places offer good interaction inside classrooms and reduce the possibility of distraction, it will add some competition between

students

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in order to gain high marks.

For instance

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, in 2020, during the pandemic COVID-19, I was studying master’s degree, so when my university closed, we resumed the semester with an online mode. Sometimes during lectures, I had to sleep until a doctor called my name, or [I was] doing something else

while

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attending a lecture. In conclusion,

school

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substitution of formal education by online [learning] is an obvious issue these days

due to

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technical advancement.

Schools

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have a crucial role in building and improving

students

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' personalities.

Furthermore

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, elevates their academic attainment.

Submitted by afnan.sa1992 on Mon Dec 02 2024

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task achievement

For task achievement, your response is complete and directly addresses the task. However, to enhance your argument, you might consider adding counterpoints to your position and refuting them.

coherence cohesion

In terms of coherence and cohesion, you have logically structured paragraphs and used linking words effectively. To improve further, ensure each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next, reinforcing connections between your ideas.

task achievement

The introduction clearly states your position, which is effectively reiterated and expanded upon throughout the essay.

task achievement

You use relevant examples, such as the situation during the COVID-19 pandemic, to support your arguments.

coherence cohesion

Your paragraphs are logically structured with clear topic sentences, making it easy to follow.

12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

306 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

social development
fostering communication
personalized guidance
immediate feedback
replicated
structured environments
discipline
time management skills
extracurricular activities
nurture talents
inculcate
sense of community
shared learning experiences
equal access
learning opportunities

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Schools are no longer necessary because children can get so much information available through the Internet and they can study just as well at home. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Stress is now a major problem in many countries around the world. What are some of the factors in modern society that cause stress, and how can we reduce it?

Some people believe that it is better to stay with one company during a career. Do you agree or disagree with this point of view?

Some people say free time activities for children should be organized by parents. Others say that children should be free to choose what they do in their free time. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In many professional sports, there is an increase in the number of athletes using banned substances to improve their performance. What are the causes of the phenomenon and what are some of the possible solutions?